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52 YEAR OLD HEATHER GRAHAM STILL HAS IT

6/20/2022

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Yesterday was not a great day for one of my favorite bands, Khruangbin. Well, technically, it's been a rough week, but yesterday, they announced that Iberia and British airlines lost Laura Lee and Mark's guitars!

Dear internet, @Iberia_en @Iberia_de @British_Airways have lost both of our guitars and no one has been helpful in locating them. It’s been a week. PLEASE HELP.

— Khruangbin (@Khruangbin) June 19, 2022
Luckily, the universe smiled upon them as their axes were returned today.
View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Khruangbin (@khruangbin)

But on the bright side, while they were worrying about whether or not their guitars would get returned, Khru got some fantastic publicity from 52-year-old goddess Heather Graham's Instagram reel. 
View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Heather Graham (@imheathergraham)

Wow!!

​A+ song choice by Felicity Shagwell. "Time (You and I)" was a tremendous selection to accompany her whimsically bouncing around at the beach and a boat (likely yacht). Look how fucking adorable and fun woman is. She's out here living her best life, looking way better than chicks half her age. I'd trade a year off my life for her to cough on me.

I don't wanna hear shit about "well yeah, she's rich" because plenty of other celebs look like rooting pumpkins past 50. I reference Heather Graham all the time for good reason. She's fucking Heather Graham. Rollergirl. I've had a crush on her since I was like seven or year years old thanks to Austin Powers. She's, to use a term I hate but am starting to use unironicially, goated. She;s super talented and IMO one the most beautiful women to ever grace this planet. We're all lucky to alive while she is. Every project she's in, is better because of her. She made Anger Management watchable thanks to her Red Sox undies.
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She's why season four is the best season of Scrubs.
And the Hangover would've tripled what it made at the box office it she had more scenes.
I've wanted to blog my 50+ still sexy All Stars for a while (but have been too pussy in fears of pushback), but Heather would be front and center with fellow Austin Powers love interest, Elizabeth Hurley.
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A post shared by Elizabeth Hurley (@elizabethhurley1)

Fuck it...that blog is coming at some point this summer, but this was far from the first time Heather showed Khruangbin some love online.
View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Heather Graham (@imheathergraham)

But with all the horrors of humanity shoved in our faces every day, sometimes it's nice to focus on the good parts of life, like Heather Graham and Khruangbin. Today just so happens to be the first day of the rest of my life.

Even though it didn’t start for good until about an hour ago, today is the first day of the rest of my life. I cannot continue to live the way I am & expect to live much longer. I have way too much value to this planet to eat myself to death. I am ready to fight for me again.

— Doz #HireDozo (@DozonLife) June 20, 2022
It can be easy to get down with the horrors of democratic backsliding and people less talented than you living your Barstool dream, but reels like Heather's help you realize what life is all about----being hot and having fun. I want to travel the world, dance around with beautiful women, and listen to great tunes. Thank you, Heather Graham, for still being a fucking rocket at 52 and inspiring me not to shove Taco Bell down my throat tonight. When my body becomes less gross and I'm eating box again, know your reel had something to do with my bounce back. If you ever want to recreate the opening scene to The Sitter, you know where to find me, @dozonlife.
P.S.

I started watching Hacks last night and while I genuinely enjoy it so far, the opening scene using "Evan Finds the Third Room" definitely didn't hurt. Yes, I love seeing my favorite artists get exposure, YES.
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