Look I know I'm in no position to be critiquing the physical appearances of other men. I sure as hell could use a lot of help. However I know my strengths and weaknesses. I'm not gonna wear skin tight clothes. With that being said Colby Rasmus has to be fucking with us right? I mean there's no way he can seriously think this looks good and is happy when he looks into the mirror? This has to be for attention and to get people like me to write shit, right? There's no way a living human with a brain willingly thought this was a good look/idea. As much as I hate the Yankees hair rules, shit like this makes me understand why they're in place. For those of you who don't know who Colby Rasmus is, he's a journeyman major league outfielder (currently on the Tampa Bay Rays) who has gained notoriety for his power, disgusting Amish beard and overall greasy redneck demeanor. I just need to know is he doing this just because he can? Or because he thinks it's a good look? Because the psyche of this man has to be in question if he thinks the Mose Schrute/Abe Lincoln look is a good one. I mean he's a major league baseball player, he doesn't have to fall into the societal norms with his appearance, we've seen guys take advantage of that with ridiculous looks in the past. Some of the coolest and most memorable players in baseball have experimented with strange hair/beard combos. Using the fact that you can have fun with your appearance has been going on in baseball for generations but none have ever been as ugly as Colby Rasmus. I feel like he showers maybe once a week. I can't imagine Colby Rasmum smelling good either. Probably why he keeps bouncing around, smelling up cities and over staying his welcome.
You know that scene in Remember the Titans when Petey is like "I just gotta know" at lunch after Sunshine kissed Gerry and wanted to know if he was gay or not. He didn't care either way, just wanted to know. I'm kind in the same spot here. I'll never like Colby Rasmus, he's a bum who's on the Rays. I hate the Rays and I kind of hate him tbh. But I just gotta know if he's trolling or not. Because at least then I could respect him for being in on the fun with this hate crime against facial hair he's currently rocking. As much as I find his beard repulsive I could at least respect the troll job. I mean I sure as hell wouldn't be talking about a guy who hit .206 last year if he was normal looking. Gun to your head do you think Colby Rasmus knows what he's doing or just genuinely doesn't care and wants to have the worst beard in the history of beards and life?
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