I'm a sucker for a good ole fashioned comeback story, and while I was shocked to learn this news via my fantasy league group chat (where, in addition to being the defending champion....I currently sit in 1st place at a respectable 7-2...with 7 straight wins. But it's really nbd. Mahomes and AJ Brown are on a bye this week----this incredible run is gonna come up an end soon...but we're getting off track...well, actually, while I have you here...If I had jus...lol jk) that Martavis Bryant is back in the league.
While never a star, Bryant had an impressive rookie year in 2014, where he amassed 549 yards and 8 touchdowns on just 26 receptions. Talk about a Cliff Branch-ass stat line!
He followed that up in 2015 with a career-high 50 grabs and 765 yards in just 10 games and, hands down, his career's signature play in that year's Wild Card melee. When I saw his name earlier today, I immediately looked up this clip.
In case you forgot, there's a reason why Bryant only played in 10 games during the 2015 regular season: he was suspended for violating the league's substance abuse policy. He missed the entire 2016 reason for the same "offence."
I gotta just get this out of my system quickly, but it's absolutely r-word-that-we-don't-say-anymore-unless-we're-Chris Broussard-ed that Bryant (and Josh Gordon and many others) lost prime years of their careers (if not the whole thing) because of that oh so terrible WEED, REEFER, POT, STICKY-ICKY, DEVIL'S LETTUCE. It's not even worth the time going into how hypercritical the NFL is. We all know that. It's just a shame the league hates real grass so much that they care more about smoking some than things like, say, sexual assault.
Fuck, now I'm all butthurt thinking about how Josh Gordon missed the playoffs in 2018. I loved his story that season and wish he got to be a piece of that Super Bowl run. I know he got a ring, but it's just not the same and I'm sure he thinks that too.
Who knows what Bryant still has left in the tank? He hasn't played in the NFL since 2018 but has stayed active in Canada and various other leagues. I just love seeing a story like this. I don't know much about this guy, but I'm rooting for him. I mean, I can go down the street and legally buy enough pot pens to wipe out an entire 1800s Wild West saloon town, but this YOUNG man (he's only five days younger than me) couldn't play in the NFL cause he likes to get high? At least you can use Fanduel or Draftkings or Cesaers or 853,000 other services to bet on the NFL.
For the record, I've been doing my best to wipe out an entire 1800s Wild West saloon town today if you catch my drift, so I apologize that I'm a little more roundabout and soap boxy than usual.
I mean, Martavis Bryant signed with the Dallas Cowboys, so I understand if, on some level, it's impossible to root for him, but if you are like me and at a point in life and football fandom career where you root for storylines more than allegiances or hacky NFLmemes level wisecracks this just a flat out great story. I only know a little more about his suspension and journey back to the NFL (basically anything I included here), but this news jazzed me tf up-- -Jazz Cabbage. That's another fantastic reefer nickname. I genuinely hope he can hang around for a few years and recoup some of that lost stash.
I'd love to see Martavis called up to the Cowboys' 53-man roster and make a few grabs that set up a Tony Pollard touchdown or three. Then, after all that hard work, let's get Marty his own tuddy. Then, "Redemption Song" starts blaring across the stadium, and we cut to a commercial about the NFL script.
Nobody should still be in jail or barred from like,,,,85% of jobs because they smoke a little sweet cheeba. Blah, blah, blah. If you read DOL you likely agree, and if you don't...the fuck is wrong with you, narc?
Honestly, as long as you aren't high while on the clock, I think everybody should be able to partake. Frankly, it's actually a performance enhancer for many professions. If everybody smoked weed war would probably still exist (assuming capitalism is in place), but there would be waaaayy less of it.