My car is still in the shop, so I'm trying to make the best of this time away from the roads to get back in the swing of blogging, but the truth is I'm having difficulty finding stuff to write about, which then makes me feel like a piece of shit and doubt my incredible abilities.
I'm not gonna blog about the Olympics; I've collectively seen about six minutes of coverage and frankly don't care either way. I thought about touching on the Simone Biles situation, but again, I don't really care that much about it, and the internet has no room for gray areas. IMO it wasn't worth the risk. If someone who's literally the best in their niche-ass field thinks they're in a spot where it's not safe for them to compete, that's good enough for me. I've thought about dabbling back into America's Pastime. After all, I watched an inning and a half of the Red Sox last night since they were on ESPN, and I gotta say, their defense in the bottom of the 8th was the best I've seen all season, but when I can't even watch 90% of their games if I wanted to (thanks a lot Youtube TV!), that's not saying a lot. With it officially being August and pre-season football right around the corner, at this point, the NFL is my best bet. I thought about covering Mac Jones dressing up like Cam Newton for a rookie skit.
But again, the PC/comedy police have me scared of somehow getting canceled (because I have such a massive following with sooo much to lose) for making a joke like this....
Mac Jones showing up to the rookie skit show.
If you want to get mad at anybody, get mad at The Office for giving me the ability to reference that scene or Mac Jones for this bizarre Halloween costume that helps make the joke.
But that was nine years ago, and Mac Jones was literally 13 years old. I'm not a cancel culture guy, and clearly, he's moved past this error in judgment and a DUI relatively unscathed. I'm just saying this backstory is an added layer for people who realize that we're all going to die someday, and getting mad about what fucked up things people find funny to ease the pain of existence and the horrors of humanity is fucking idiotic.
Anyways, I guess I'll blog about this Carson Wentz situation because, frankly, it has me actually feeling bad for Carson Wentz. We all know Carson's been broken since he tore his ACL against the Rams in 2017 and watched Big Dick Nick Foles lead his team to a Super Bowl win. He's only played an entire season once (2019) since his rookie year, and even then, he got hurt in the playoff game, subjecting us to Russell Wilson vs. Josh McCown (who to his credit, played decently). Between that and Jalen Hurts' "emergence," he clearly needed a fresh start. It looked like teaming up with his former offensive coordinator, Frank Reich in Indy, was a match made in coaches-who-understand-you-heaven. Unfortunately for Carson, he's out for anywhere between five to 12 weeks after undergoing foot surgery (at some point today).
How the fuck is he doing the Star Trek thing with his off hand while throwing? That cannot be good form.
I'm not going to act like your crazy fill-in-the-family-member on Facebook; I know I'm not a doctor or health care professional. I'm not going to deny the possibility that 5-12 weeks could genuinely be the timetable. I'm just saying from an optics standpoint; this is an awful look for a guy like Carson Wentz. You simply cannot put him in this situation. The way I see it, you gotta say something like, "Carson Wentz could be out for 12 weeks after undergoing foot surgery." It's classic controlling the narrative. Now, if it takes him the full 12 weeks, NBD, that's what people were expecting, but should he be ready in like 5-6, you can say how tough he is and how much he wants to get out there with his new squad, that he's hungry to compete. You can't measure his drive. You know, all that cringe-worthy football speak bull shit.
According to Reich, this is why the timetable for his return is so open-ended. Via ESPN: Reich said the reason for the wide recovery timetable is because players recover at different ranges. The team will possibly have a better understanding on Wentz's return once he starts the rehabilitation process between the two to four week range. The first two weeks after the surgery will be mainly rest. "Knowing Carson, I'm optimistic," Reich said. "Knowing this is the type of injury you don't have to be pain-free to play in. You have to get to an acceptable level of tolerating pain and then you can start playing. That could happen early."
This is EXACTLY why you error on the long side! Set yourself and your guy up for success. It's the same reason I tell my grandma I'll be there in two hours and show up in 80 minutes. If Carson Wentz is out for 10+ weeks now you're gonna have people thinking he's some pussy who can't handle the pain. You can't say it's 5-12 weeks and an injury where you don't have to be pain-free to play. I know I'm just a fake teacher/driver/blogger who's been paid for three of 1000+ blogs, but this is horrible PR. Then again, the Colts have never really cared about that.
Despite feeling genuine empathy for Carson Wentz, there are two hilarious takeaways from this situation. The first is how even though Carson Wentz has left Philly, he can still fuck them over by making their draft compensation worse (graphic via CBS Sports).
Secondly, look who might be moving from the Windy City to the Indy City to replace him for the next 5-12 weeks.
If Wentz is out for close to three months, the Colts need to figure out what to do while he's gone ASAP. Their roster is loaded (especially with the addition of Kwity Paye!); I think they could compete for a Super Bowl given the right QB, but with how intense their schedule is to start the year: Seahawks, Rams, @ Titans, @ Dolphins and @ Ravens, they're going to need to figure out something or else they could be out of the race by mid-October (even though the 2018 Colts started 1-5 and made the playoffs). Those five teams went a combined 54-26 last season, with four of them making the playoffs, and the Dolphins certainly could've in most years with their 10-6 record.
In short, I feel bad for Carson Wentz, plz don't kill me for a solid joke, and the Colts being in the AFC South is stupid.
P.S.
5-12 being a potential record in the NFL this year still fucks me up. It'd be a real shame if that's what the Colts ended up this year. Real shame, indeed.
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