On Monday July 18th something odd happened, my phone just stopped charging. I'd have it plugged in and there was no little lightning icon. My phone was acting like someone who got a transplant but their body was rejecting it. Basically my iPhone is acting like Tobias after he got hair plugs. My phone is still works minus the whole not charging aspect which is what really sucks cause it's not even like I did something stupid to break it. . Now I am on day 15 of not having a cell phone and it is so bizarre. I'm almost okay with it, I kind of like it at times, it adds some mystery to me and has caused me to not tweet 380 times a day. So for the most part it honestly hasn't been that bad, but then as soon as I see people on snapchat or texting then I just get wicked bad FOMO. I've done some cool stuff the last 15 days and want to share it on social media.
I've gone a couple days without a phone before but now it's been over 2 weeks and is getting a little ridiculous, I bought one off of groupon because I don't wanna get a new iPhone and be locked in when the 7 is coming out in like a month. I did that when I got an iPhone 5 3 years ago and swore I'd never be stuck with the old phone when a new one is coming out soon. But of course they sent me the wrong phone and I've been trying to get that whole situation figured out. Who knew unlocking an iPhone would be such a fucking process? Maybe I'll just be that dude who doesn't have a phone. Is that cool? Would be a very hipster move of me. But my main point I want to write about is how the hell did ANYTHING happen before cell phones? Now I'm probably gonna sound like a complaining millennial but I'm 100% serious. I get it people used house phones and there were pay phones everywhere, I can even remember using a pay phone as a kid. But It is almost impossible to make plans when you don't have a cell phone. I was driving to a bar last week and straight up saw a friend leaving work, stopped, parked my car, got out and told him to come grab a beer. That's how I've been making plans when I don't have a phone. Straight up running into people and telling them we should chill. Luckily I have an iPad too so I've been using that to text people and try to keep up to date with social media but as soon as I leave my house I'm SOL. What sucks is even without a phone I've still managed to send stupid drunk texts. I'm just a mess bro, but If I'm alone or at work I'm 100% out of the loop. No idea what's going on. It's soooooo boring when I'm driving too now that I can't text/tweet/read barstool/read anything honestly/ go on snapchat/record myself singing/check my email/go on tinder/go on Facebook/play Candy Crush/check my bank account while driving. What am I supposed do? Pay attention to the road? No lie driving without a phone is very scary, especially when you drive for your job. I know I sound like a worrier but if I get in an accident or something bad happens I'm screwed. At least back in the day I could just walk to a pay phone. That's not even an option anymore. I'm guessing there are like 29 pay phones left in the continental United States. Don't like my odds of finding one. Now I'd basically have to either ask a stranger to use their phone, which while on a highway may not be the easiest thing to do, or walk to find help. Basically I'm going to die. How anybody made plans before cell phones is mind blowing. Last weekend luckily it was the Blessing of the Fleet and I could just show up and meet my friends that were there, but is that how life worked before phones. Did people just go out and hope they ran into their friends? So fascinated by all of this. The idea of not being able to text people and having to talk to them face to face or on the phone sucks. I hate talking on the phone, I'm so bad at it, unless you're my mother I never want to to talk to you on the phone. I guess that's it I just had to get all this out since I don't have a phone and can't text anybody. Hopefully this whole fiascos will be figured out soon. Oh I have AT&T if anybody wants to hook me up with a phone so I don't have to wait another 3 days for one to get shipped in. P.S. According to google there are less than 500,000 functioning pay phones in the U.S. Technically that's a very vague answer and 29 is less than 500,000 so I may have been spot on with my guess. I don't believe for one second there are that many though, I've been a few states and haven't seen a pay phone since like 2006. My guess is there is some random pay phone bank in the middle of Wyoming or something that must make up for the majority of working pay phones remaining.
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