Mick Jagger was trending on twitter today, luckily for him it's not because he died. Nope today it was announced that Rolling Stones frontman Mick Jagger, 72 and his girlfriend Melanie Hamrick, 29 are expecting their first child together.
I mean the real question is would you wanna be this kid? Sure you're gonna be set finically for life, but I mean you're gonna be a fucking weirdo. Your mom is ballerina gold-digger who is fucking a dude who's been famous since the 60's. I mean it's insane, I'm pretty sure JFK was still alive when the Rolling Stone's first greatest hits record came out.
But like this poor kid is never gonna have a chance. Like you have to know your parents never truly loved each other. If Mick Jagger was Mike Jagger, a 72 year old regular old brit there's no way some hot ballerina is with him. Just one man's opinion. But I mean good for Mick Jagger for still being alive at this point. Chris Rock was right, British rock stars don't die.
I wanna knock Mick but I can't mean what do you want him to do, not have sex with ballerinas that are 53 years younger than him? But I mean I can't help but feel a little bad for this kid. I mean best case scenario Mick Jagger lives for what another 15 years? Sure he/she will be rich, but your dad is a great grand father. Imagine this poor kid in school explaining his family tree? I don't even wanna begin to understand how it works. Plus there's noooooo way that Mick is gonna help raise this kid. He's 72. He's gonna be in diapers at the same time as his own child. So I guess they can bond over that. It's just really gonna suck when this kid is gonna miss a 6th grade field trip because he has to go to his dad's funeral. The saddest part is it won't even be sad because Jagger will be dying of natural causes.