Even without Timelord, the Celtics are playing at a historically elite level, so I've moved on/forgotten about Ime Udoka and the drama that ensued before the season started. I've also thoroughly enjoyed this meme as the C's continue to put up 130+ points a night.
And you best believe Joe doesn't give half a fuck about the royal family sitting court side!
But back to Nia Long and her hard feeling toward the Celtics. This ordeal was a bizarre situation that was quite confusing at the time. What could Ime have done that was so bad to get suspended for a season but not outright fired after helping this franchise make the NBA Finals: Presented by YoutubeTV for the first time since 2010?
It looks like he had a consensual extramarital affair with a woman involved with the Celtics then things got worse, as there's allegations of harassment. There's no denying it's a messy situation, but they have to bring that up. They can't just sit on that information. It'd be a million times worse if they did and that eventually saw the light of day.
I get why you're in pain, Nia (yayyy I've been cheated on too!). As a hashtag good guy I don't wanna seem cold, but like yo, the Celtics aren't "in the business of protecting women." They're a fucking professional basketball team. Don't get me wrong. I'm sure they don't want to see anything bad happen to women, but this is a professional basketball team. If anything it's implied. Like the C's want kids to be safe at their games but it isn't their responsibility to make sure they're fully strapped in to an appropriate car seat after the game ends. What do you want? Lucky to do a wellness check? Brad to babysit your kids and talk about their feelings? This shit is already awkward enough. Do you think Wyc is gonna make a call and make sure your kid's doing okay because daddy keeps his D wetter than a Jayson Tatum pull-up three?
You got cheated on by your longtime fiance that you haven't married yet. It sucks, but it's not like your kid is sick or somebody died. We're talking about an affair. People cheat literally every day. This is the NBA. Look up what happened with Steve Nash and Jason Richardson. Strip clubs and side chicks are an open secret in NBA culture. Cheating is a part of NBA lore. I'm not saying it's right, but we're trying to win a fucking ring here. It may seem cold, but the Celtics and their social media teams only cared about you because you were the coach's chick, and people get horny about pictures of you from the 90s because who doesn't love to reminisce. They used you for clicks and engagements, babe. Cold World, no blanket. Again, I am a hashtag good guy and a feminist, but your anger might be directed toward the wrong people. As far as we all know, the Boston Celtics didn't make Ime slip up.
If anything, they've gone above and beyond here by basically firing him. Do you think Red Auerbach would've fired Tommy Heinsohn or KC Jones if they were getting some on the side? Fuck no. This was a progressive and unprecedented move by the Celtics. Would it have been nice if they checked in? Sure. But I have friends that haven't texted me in months, and I've gained 100+ pounds since Covid and make references online to being depressed all the time. I get a "good blog, Doz" maybe once every three months despite putting out hundreds of bangers a year. And we actually have history together! I understand that as we get older people have their own shit to worry about and don't take it personally because I know nobody is actively trying to make me feel worse. Okay, that was a low-key lie because I take everything personally, but I hope you get my point. Again, I don't wanna sound cold, but the Celtics don't owe you shit. Yell at Ime, not us. We're just tryna win a ring. Do you think the Tampa Bay Buccaneers checked in on Gisele?
Speaking of Joe and JT, congratulations!!!