As I was laying naked like a baby on bearskin run on my bed editing #43Burgers vids, instead of jumping in the shower like I was planning, some shocking news just dropped from the sky!
With the Red Sox making the 2nd biggest mistake in franchise history, the likelihood of a true Boston sports doomsday scenario happening where Tom Brady signs elsewhere grows by the day. As a matter of fact the Bucs are the current betting favorites to sign TB12. If it wasn't for this fucking pandemic shutting down schools and my income I'd throw down at the Pats +110. I refuse to believe RKK actually allows this to happen.
After locking up veteran safety (and captain) Devin McCourty for two more years it looks like the Patriots are actually going to make moves this off-season.
Rumors around the league were that the Jets were willing to give Thuney basically whatever he wanted to secure his services. Belichick continues to do whatever he can to royally fuck the Jets and I am loving every second of it. While this tagging seems a lot more likely of a tactical move to trade Thuney instead of losing him for nothing (potentially a compensatory pick next year) it means the Jets will likely not be getting their man. Checkmate.
With DeAndre Hopkins on the block and the Texans always needing O-line help because they're the Texans can a boy dream about shipping a guard (and draft capital) to H-Town for a weapon to entice Tom Brady to stay? Whatever happens as a former lineman, I salute you, Joe for getting the bag (14.7 million guaranteed this year). Thanks for helping the Pats win two rings. I'd love to see ya stay, but if the Pats trade you I hope it's to a non-scumbag franchise. I like Joe and wouldn't mind seeing him stay, but in the business of the NFL idk if 25 million dollars allocated to guards is a good idea. Gotta pay Brady and keep the boogeymen together! Alas, fuck the Jets and COVID-19; Joe Thuney is going to be a v rich man!
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