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The Patriots Would Be Fools To Take a Quarterback in The First Round

4/25/2018

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The first round of the NFL draft is tomorrow night at AT&T Stadium. I can't remember how long the "new" format of the NFL draft has been a thing, but I am a muuuuch bigger fan of the old format. To me the new version is wayyyy too dragged out. It's like the NBA draft lottery on steroids. But at least ESPN only wastes a half hour of your time doing something that could take 48 seconds.

The NFL draft just doesn't need to take 3 fucking days. Plain and simple. I love football but do not need three full days of draft coverage. I don't want to have to stay in on a Friday night to watch the 2nd and 3rd rounds and pretend like I know who the fuck half these dudes are. What happened to the good ole days where you could just spend 8 hours on a Saturday watching the draft with your buddies instead of having a life?  I yearn for those days.

Even though I hate how prolonged the draft is, of course I'm going to watch. It's football (sorta) and I love football. I'm actually v excited to see what the Patriots do. For the first time since 2012 the Patriots have multiple first round picks. That worked out pretty well. They drafted Chandler Jones and Dont'a Hightower 21st and 25th respectively.
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Both were huge parts of the Super Bowl XLIX team, and Dont'a Hightower made one of the biggest defensive plays in team history during the 28-3 comeback in Super Bowl LI. 
Both were great picks, even if Chandler Jones and his barefoot fake weed ass is playing in the desert now.

After nearly 20 years of being a Pats fan I've learned that you're better off not trying to predict what the Patriots are going to do from a personal stand point because Belichick doesn't give a fuck about your 16.3 mock draft. This man once took Tavon Wilson in the 2nd round when he wasn't even expected to be drafted. He almost exclusively shops at Rutgers for talent. Belichick has gotten rid of more guys in their prime than Menudo.

While I know the odds of anybody important at 1 Patriot Place reading this are about the same as Larry David becoming President I felt it was important to voice how a lot of Patriot fans feel:

Do not use these first round picks to move up and draft a QB.

Tbh I don't want the Patriots to use a first round pick on a QB at all. Unless you can get Baker Mayfield (the only guy I truly believe in) at 23 I think they need to avoid a QB altogether.

I know we are getting close to the end of the Tom Brady era but I didn't hear no bell yet. He's still here so let's go all out in trying to win another Super Bowl(s).

Despite being the defending AFC champs this roster needs some serious TLC and I ain't 2 proud to beg for them to be smart and reload instead of worrying about the heir-apparent to Tom Brady. I don't buy into the learn under Brady stuff that much. It helps for sure, but it's not like having Tom Brady start over you for two seasons is going to turn you from Tim Tebow to Drew Brees passing the ball. Jimmy G is good because he's talented, obviously Brady being around helps to a certain extent, but I think we need to give Jimmy the credit he deserves for how talented he is. You know that Brian Hoyer "learned" under Brady too, right? Matt Cassel had one great year (with the rest of a team who went 16-0) after being Brady's understudy for 3 seasons. Bottom line nobody is picking Brian Hoyer to win them a football game. In Hoyer's one career playoff start he got shut out at home by the Kansas City Chiefs. You know, that team who has one playoff win in the last 25 years?

It'd be one thing if there was a true can't miss QB in this draft, but IMO there isn't. I don't believe in hype on the Pac-12 guys. Josh Allen seems like a cool guy but I think he's going to be a bust. I know you're racist for thinking it, but Lamar Jackson is not an accurate passer, especially against good competition. I'd much rather see this team try to go after it's many glaring needs in the draft instead of hoping to strike gold finding the next Tom Brady. (they already did and traded him to San Francisco for 2nd round pick)

I know Brady's going to be 41 this season, but Tom Brady nearly single handedly won this team a Super Bowl in 2017. He was the league MVP and as long as he keeps getting rubbed down by Alex Guerrero and making out with his son I think he can still play at an elite level. There are just way more glaring needs on this team than the successor to TB12. Why waste first round money on a guy who isn't gonna play for at least two seasons? Drafting a QB to take over for Brady in the first round this year would be like using your rent check on a security deposit on another apartment when you still have 10 months on your lease. It makes no sense, you already have a place to stay. 

​There are more holes on this defense than Edward James Olmos' face. 
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Pretty much the entire front 7 except Dont'a Hightower and Trey Flowers sucks. They could sack a bag of potatoes. They need a corner to replace Malcolm Butler, a new left tackle since Nate Solder signed with the Giants like a coward. They still have James White and Rex Burkhead, but they need to find a way to make up for Dion Lewis' productivity out of the backfield. Brandon Cooks and Danny Amendola are gone. They need a Gronk insurance policy. Bottom line there are much more glaring needs than a young 1st round quarterback. Plus since it's the Patriots, if they want to move up in the draft I bet teams will be asking for a kings ransom, they're gonna have to pay a buck fifty on the dollar. Nobody is going to want to like "sure let's help the Patriots potentially find the next QB that is going to kick our ass for a decade". 

If anything the last three non-Patriot Super Bowl winners have shown that you don't need an elite QB to win a Super Bowl. They all were carried by defenses (even though the Eagles defense gave up a Super Bowl record for yards, they still were one of the best all season, which again just shows how great Tom Brady still is). The legion of Boom and the Seahawks defense is why the Seahawks won Super Bowl XLVIII, not Russell Wilson. Peyton Manning was basically a cadaver for the 2015 Broncos, and Nick Foles, while he lit up a horrible Patriots defense in this year's Super Bowl, he's fucking Nick Foles and not starting this season. I wouldn't be shocked if he never started another playoff game.


The odds of finding the next star QB in this draft (at least early) are slim AF, if Brady gets hurt you're done no matter what so you might as well try to build the best team around him as you can possible for the next 2-4 years before he finally retires. Use the picks to get a LT and some pass rush, or a DB,I don't care what it is, trade back and get more capital. Just don't waste a 1st round pick on a QB who isn't gonna play for two years when you could drastically improve the team on the field this year in hopes for a 3rd title in 5 seasons.
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