Tom and Rita Hanks Have the Coronavirus AND NOW THE NBA IS SUSPENDED

We all know the story of the boy who cried wolf. I did not respect the Coronavirus at first. Hand  up. In my defense; there’s been a new disease hysteria that’s going to kill us all every few years as long as I can remember. When I was a kid it was Mad Cow and West Nile. Then there was SARS and Bird Flu and countless others. Obviously people would die during these “outbreaks” and that is technically sad, but it never turned into the Black Plague or Spanish Flu of World War I (aka the Great War at the time). Both legitimately altered mankind wiping out tens of millions.  

Tbh it wasn’t until a few hours ago when the NCAA announced that March Madness is going to be played fan-less that the seriousness of this really hit close to home me. We both know how much the NCAA loves money and hates humanity, so for them to make a decision like this that will costs millions is no joke; despite the tone.

Now it appears that COVID-19/Coronavirus has its Rock Hudson, as American’s dad Tom Hanks and fellow thespian/his wife Rita Wilson have tested positive.

I mean what can you say other than this sucks and you hope they survive? Gotta hope that Toy Story money can handle a disease that sounds like a gun in Call of Duty.

Live look at Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson down unda.

BREAKING IN THE-MAKING-OF-THIS-BLOG NEWS;

This is no joke, Ronny. Rudy Gobert has now tested positive. WTF?!???

Holy shit I hope all these aforementioned people are alright long-term. 8th grade quality writing blog rn but I am in medium key shock. I guess the fatality rate is still pretty low, but this shit is starting to get pretty fucking scary now that names of people we all know have been hit. I’m not gonna act like I know the legit stats, but I am officially concerned. Last night I got duped by a fake tweet that said Daniel Radcliffe was infected. This is wild. I don’t wanna go after long and have to announce another person.

​ Hopefully this can save the day and not cost like $4700 per dose.

P.S. “This X aged poorly” is one of my least favorite internet clichés, but that word exists for a reason: holy shit this aged like avocado, amirite America??

Rudy Gobert thought it was funny to touch every single mic and recorder in the media room.

Now, he has Coronavirus and the entire NBA season is suspendedpic.twitter.com/A22U5AgmBi

— Sports ReUp (@SportsReUp) March 12, 2020