I took today off on account of me fucking hating my job and being like 258 pounds overweight, so I need to sleep 12 hours a day. When finally I awoke from my slummer for good at 11:35 am, I laid in bed a little more, trying to find the motivation to start my day off. About 45 minutes later, I got up and saw perhaps the most incredible line-up in the history of music and line-ups—time to pass the torch, Woodstock '99.
When We Were Young Fest is an emo/scene kids blacked-out eyes wet dream. If you went to school in the United States between 2001-2009, you probably liked at least one of these artists, or at the very least, knew plenty of skinny jean-wearing kids who did. Actually fuck that, EVERYBODY loved Avril Lavigne's "Complicated."
I didn't go to my first real concert (I saw Joe Diffy, the pick-up man at a fair when I was a boy) until after high school and missed out on the prime of so many great acts. Now at 30, this festival feels like a second chance. I've got like nine months to get fuckable, because you know the emotions and mascara will be flowing.
I LOVED emo music when I was in middle and high school (one of my screen names was AveNGerRYanfold) and also to this day, but I had to hide my true identity due to being a **star** football player ---until spirit week senior year.
Unfortunately, because haters are everywhere, this star studded-leather belt from Hot Topic line-up has people calling this "Emo Fyre Fest" on the Twitter machine.
1. A conman put Fyre Fest together on a remote island that lacked basic infrastructure, with the backing of ONE washed-up rapper. This is LAS VEGAS, baby. It's not 1942 (although the GQP wishes it were); they've got the whole ample lodging, food, and bathroom situation handled. Even if this festival were to fail, you're in Vegas, so it's not that bad. You can still salvage the weekend. Maybe the Raiders are town?
2. Live Nation has their name on this, and since they basically have a monopoly on concerts, I think it's gonna work out just fine. To piggyback off of #1, look at how many artists are involved. Even if you're, let's say, a blogger who's never heard of Payale Royale, Acceptance, or Horrorpops, we've got the BIG GUNS like My Chemical Romance, Paramore, and Taking Back Sunday putting their name on this.
3. I'm buying a ticket the first chance I get on Friday. Even if this is a scam, THIS CAPTAIN GOES DOWN WITH THE SHIP, ALL HANDS ON DECK, STAND HIP TO HIP.
Hopefully Paramore grows up and plays "Misery Business."
But regardless, I cannot wait for this festival. I've already talked to multiple friends from high school (2) and this is fucking happening. I don't know what I'll be doing for work in October, maybe I'll have to take the time off from Barstool, but as long as my heart is still pumping blood throughout my body, I will be at this incredible arrange of emo Hall of Famers. I don't understand how this is a one date event, but I do not care! See you in Vegas!
I LOVE that Wolf Alice is in the mix. Don't think that I missed them on the line-up.
1/18/2022 06:18:51 pm
I SHOUT THE ORDER, SHOOT TO KILL
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