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The Celtics Reveal New "City Edition" Jerseys

11/20/2020

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From the rafters to the parquet, it’s all about #TheBanner. pic.twitter.com/YVwvba5U1j

— Boston Celtics (@celtics) November 20, 2020
On my way home from work after another wasted week of my life as a babysitter/janitor/COVID police​...

So glad I spent five years in college to become a glorified janitor 5 hours a week. #lunchdutydoz pic.twitter.com/LpV5vmhki2

— Doz #hiredozo (@DozonLife) November 20, 2020
...I saw a jeep with the vanity plate "NYY 27" and said out loud to myself "look at this bald, piece of shit, Yankee fan douchebag".  While I may  no longer identify as a Red Sox fan, I'll always hate the Yankees and what they represent. 

One of the most annoying things about that fanbase (besides rooting for Duke, the Lakers and the Cowboys) is how they constantly scream "27!" in reference to their 27 World Series wins that include 10 from before baseball was integrated and another 10 prior to 1963 (three full years before the first Super Bowl) whenever they have clearly lost a debate that requires an ounce of thought or wit. 

I don't really understand bragging about championships that happened before you were alive. I'm sure I did it with the C's in my youth, but my brain wasn't fully developed yet, so I get a free pass. Yeah, I'd wear a throwback 1976 NBA Champs shirt, but I certainly wouldn't start talking shit to Suns fans (if I knew any) about how they went down in six to Hondo, Cowens and the boys during America's Bicentennial.
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​It's cool to be a fan of a team who's historically one of the most successful in their sport; but guess what? I'm an almost 29 year old Celtics fan. So I've witnessed exactly one (1) of their 17 championships in my life. ​Timothy B. Schmitt didn't get a Grammy for "Lyin' Eyes" when he joined the Eagles in 1977. Unless you're over 40, you are in the same boat as Ole Dozo. 

The legacy and history of this organization is among the best in all of the four major sports; there's no denying that. I love how the C's only fly NBA Championship banners.

The thing about traditions is -- some are meant to be □□□□□□□□□. @Vistaprint ☘️ #TheBanner pic.twitter.com/IOF0Iiaz61

— Boston Celtics (@celtics) November 20, 2020
But you know what? When you have only added one (1) banner to your collection in the last 33 years and teams like the Houston Rockets, Miami Heat and Golden State Warriors can claim more, it's kind of annoying and embarrassing to always be talking about all your championships that happened when there were still "colored" drinking fountains. We've been saying "It's all about 18" since I was a junior in high school. It's almost as embarrassing as this. We're one step below Yankee fans at this point living so far in the past. The New Jersey Devils have three times as many championships as the Celtics do since 1987. You don't see them turning their uniforms into the Stanley Cup.

It'd be one thing if the Celtics won the bubble cup or even held on to a 13 point third quarter lead in game 7 of the 2010 Finals. But to base your new "City Edition" alternate on something you've only accomplished once since Full Metal Jacket came out when you're becoming the 1970's Minnesota Vikings* of the Eastern Conference Finals  just rubs me the wrong way.
I haven't even scratched the service of how visually unappealing these uniforms are. I won't take credit for this, but these are straight out of a "Hulu Has Live Sports" commercial. 
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Are these the worst Celtics uniforms of the last 10 years?

Not even a little bit.
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But in short, ya boi Ole Dozo is not a fan! 

Official review of the new Celtics jerseys: pic.twitter.com/SKovTUzepF

— Doz #hiredozo (@DozonLife) November 20, 2020
P.S. 

These are the best Celtics alternates of my lifetime.
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* the Purple People Eater Minnesota Vikings lost three Super Bowls in four years (1973, '74 and '76); four overall (1969 to the AFL champion Kansas Chiefs!)
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