My Rhode Island Rams' New Secondary Logo Stinks P! U!

Image Source

​This isn't exactly breaking news, but my beloved University of Rhode Island is usually a little behind the times, so no harm, no foul. Last week URI announced a new secondary logo.

8 months to come up with THIS??? #URIprobs pic.twitter.com/tRcxnggBJ4

— Doz #HireDozo (Steely Doz) (@DozonLife) February 6, 2022

Yes, it is true. I am the man behind the ultra-successful Twitter account @URIprobs, which had over 6,000 followers at its peak. #HireDozo. It's easy to assume I hate all things URI, especially when I recently shit on their new AAU jerseys, but in reality, I love my university. I had some of the best times of my life at URI. I just want more out of my university. I expect better. I want a center court scoreboard.

I know what you're thinking. Dozie, how can the school that spent over a million dollars to develop the captivating "Think Big. We Do." waste eight months to come up with a logo that looks like a generic Madden 06 create-a-team logo? I'd tell you that's a more than fair question, friendo. My guess is they set this imaginary 8-month timeline, forgot until a week ago and just searched for "Ram logo" on google images. Found one that 5,000+ high schools have been using for over 40 years, made sure the nose looks juuuust enough like a dick for the average person to notice, stole it, changed the colors to our ugly two-tone blue [pick a fucking blue (KEANEY), Rhody] and bam there's your new logo.

I don't wanna be too negative; that's genuinely not my swag, I swear. If URI dropped some fire-ass logo, I'd be the first person to soup them up and wouldn't wait nearly a week to bring it up on my lil ole blog. Instead, we have the K-Mart special again. I haaate the dark shadow under the horns. It's too busy and screams "we spent $75 on this."

It's good to see URI get with the times and add a secondary logo. The interlocking R-I is boring AF and hideous with the Keaney and Navy Blue. I wish they'd used this as an opportunity for a total rebrand instead of attempting to distract people from how the basketball team has lost six in a row. The 14 team Atlantic 10 Conference already has THREE teams with "Rams" as their mascot; URI, Fordham, and VCU. That's already two too many. We have about as much history as the Houston Texans; this was the perfect chance to switch shit up and come up with something fresh. THAT would be thinking big. You could totally cuck the Washington Commanders with a better name drop. Instead, we took the cheap and ugly way out, which is so out of character for THE University of Rhode Island.