The B Street Band, who call themselves the US’s ‘number one Bruce Springsteen tribute band’, are set to play at a Donald Trump inauguration ball next week.
The President-elect’s troubles in booking acts to perform at either his inauguration ceremony on January 20 or the many balls being held in his honour before and after the main event have been well documented, with a slew of invited performers either being personally turned down by Trump or refusing to play altogether. It has now been announced that the Springsteen tribute band – who take their name from the New Jersey musician’s famous E Street Band – have been booked to perform at the Garden State Gala the day before the inauguration. A “nonpartisan affair”, the gala will be held at the “elegant” Washington Court Hotel in the capital Washington D.C. on January 19.
You ever go grocery shopping with your parents growing up and they said no to something you asked for because it was too exspensive? But they felt bad and they offered to get you the store brand instead so that at least you'd have something?
You then have two options; settle for the shitty Stop & Shop brand or go without. Here Donald should've gone without. It's no secret that a ton of celebrities have vocalized their distain for the President-Elect but I didn't realize it was this bad. The leader of the free world is settling for fucking cover bands at his Inauguration Ball. This is insane to me. A cover band. Like he's some assistant manager at Dick's Sporting Goods. How is that possible? There has to be country acts that love this guy right? Or like a one hit wonder that could really use a pay check? Donald couldn't have gotten Vanilla Ice to rap or something? I mean Trump won the electoral college... there's millions of people who like this guy yet he's settling for a Bruce Springsteen cover band? I don't care how much you hate Donald, this is so embarrassing that it's just sad. Even the most far left people have to feel at least a little bad for him. I always compare politics to sports but it's a very fitting comparison. Even I feel bad for teams I hate sometimes. Perfect example being my last blog about the Chargers. I despised them growing up. I fucking hated LT and his pussy ass visor. Shawn Merriman was one of my least favorite athletes ever. I loved ripping their hearts out in the playoffs two years in a row and that the Patriots danced on their field after beating them in the 06 playoffs. But I have a soul and empathy, and feel terrible for the city that they're losing their team. I can step away for a second and just feel bad for my fellow man. That's how I feel right now. I'm not a full fledged fuck Trump guy but I also wouldn't call myself a fan and I can't help at least feel some really bad secondhand embarrassment for the guy. How crazy is that...me a loser who is 25 and lives in his dad's basement feels bad for The President of the United States. What a weird thing. The dude can't even get an actual real band to agree to play at his Inauguration Ball. It's the Inauguartion Ball for the PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES and there hasn't been a real artist who has either accepted the opportunity or volunteered (as tribute). Just think about this for a second. A man who is literally about to be the leader of the free world, who did I forget to mention is also a billionaire has to settle for the fucking B Street Band. That is absolutely insane to me. How did Donald not just give someone popular a blank check? Sure you'll get shit on twitter for a few days but then in like March you just say, Yo Donald gave us 10 million dollars to play for two hours. Then people are over it. It's just a horrible look for both Donald Trump and our country. People hate the President so much before he took office that he can't even get a real band to play his party. Unreal. And for Donald, word of advice from Ole Dozo....don't hire a cover band to play your ball. It's just sad. Get a DJ or an aux-cord, dude. Literally anything is better than a cover band. Get some 8tracks and say the theme is retro. I can't think of anything that would be more embarrassing than a cover band playing such a big event. And if you are gonna settle for a cover band at least shoot a little higher.
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The San Diego Chargers appear to be no more.
PFT has confirmed that the Chargers will soon announce their intention to move to Los Angeles. The NFL had given the franchise an extensionthrough the weekend on their option to join the Rams in L.A. In the end, the Chargers didn’t need the extra time to make the decision. The Chargers have played the last 55 seasons in San Diego after moving south after one season in Los Angeles in 1960. The Chargers will join the Rams as a second team in the L.A. market. They were given a one-year option to move the franchise to Stan Kroenke’s stadium in Inglewood when their joint proposal for a stadium with the Raiders in Carson, Calif. was rejected last January. After a failed ballot initiative for a new stadium in San Diego failed in November, the Chargers have elected to exercise that option to move. The ESPN report says the Chargers have informed Commissioner Roger Goodell and owners of their intention to move for the 2017 season. However, a formal relocation letter has not yet been sent to the league.
If you want to be an ass hole you can make the point that the Chargers are technically going home. In 1960, their first season in the AFL they were the Los Angeles Chargers. After one year they moved to San Diego and called that city home for 55 seasons. With the inabilities to get a new stadium in either of their respective cities the rumors of both the Raiders and Chargers moving have been swirling for years. The Chargers move seemed inevitable after the city of San Diego came up short for Measure C an act that would've raised hotel taxes in order to help fund a new stadium. San Diego tried to get a new stadium for over a decade. Now since it seemed like a new San Diego stadium was never going to happen the Chargers are moving 100 miles north to share the Rams new stadium once it opens in 2019. Moves like this show the true side of sports. It's a business and despite all the talk they don't give a fuck about the fans. It's about money. Couldn't be more clear when 55 seasons isn't enough to save a marriage between city and team. Yes to move the Chargers makes all the sense in the world economically; they don't have to pay to build a new stadium since they're sharing a brand new one with the Rams. The L.A. market is huge, they say sharing that market with the Rams will still make them more money than having all of San Diego to themselves. But they are turning a blind eye on a city that has loved them for 56 years really rubs me the wrong way. As a football fan and especially as AFC guy I hate this move. The Chargers are San Diego. Despite never winning a Super Bowl in the city they were beloved. Sure attendence numbers were down but that would happen anywhere in a prehistoric stadium with a subpar team on the field. There's a ton of history in the franchise going back to the days in the old AFL with HOF WR Lance Alworth and coach Sid Gillman. 1963 AFL Champions. Then in late 70's and early 80's it was Air-Coryell with Dan Fouts and Kellen Winslow. The Epic in Miami. They made the Super Bowl in the 1994 season. A team that is now remembered in tragedy for the high number of players on the roster who died prematurely, most nobably San Diego's favorite: Junior Seau. Then it was LT and Drew Brees followed by Phillip Rivers, and Antonio Gates. This team has a lot to be proud of. I just feel horrible for the people of San Diego. I can't imagine how it must feel to have your favorite team taken away from you. They're losing part of their identity and also it will negatively impact the city financially as all of the jobs in the stadium are gone. All the money generated in hotels, bars and restaurants from games are gone. When Lebron left Cleveland the city took a huge hit economically for the loss of revenue from how it impacted the team and they didn't even lose the franchise. Just a player. The team was still there. I can't imagine how much this will huge the city of San Diego from an economic standpoint. It's just really sad day and I feel terrible for the people of San Diego. Now a city that didn't have football for over 20 years now has two teams. I just have a feeling despite the new super stadium that this move is not going to go over well. LA is a different animal, it's not a football town, it's Hollywood, they won't show up if the team is bad. The novelity of the Rams seemingly wore off late in the season this year as they were playing in front of a half empty stadium.
What's even worse is they're going to be sharing a stadium with the LA Galaxy, a soccer team that holds about 27,000 people until their new home is finished. It's an absolute joke for an NFL team to be playing somewhere so small.
But worst of all, the greatest team song in the history of the NFL is ruined. No more San Diego Super Chargers. I honestly listen to this song once a week it's so fire. You can take away the team but you can never take away this funky jam.
P.S. This is the new Chargers logo and it is garbage. It's like the LA Dodgers and Tampa Bay Lightning had a one night stand and this popped out. It looks like something a freshmen in high school made on the first day of an intro to graphic design class. Song: All The Pretty Girls Artist: Kaleo Album: A/B Sometimes less is truly more. You don't always need that razzle dazzle. There are times where you just gotta get to the point. I know that first hand here on DOL. I need to be better at getting to the point. I'll write like 15 paragraphs to make a point that could be done in two.
Divorce is one of those times and James A.W. Mahon, LL. B. over here gets that. Simple and to the point. A divorce lawyer with business cards that rip in half. Possibly the perfect business card ever. So simple yet so smart. James A.W. Mahon, LL. B. Probably just looks into the mirror everyday and says to himself. "I make people's dreams come true. I help people get second(sometimes third or fourth) chances/ruin families. I give kids the gift of two Christmases. I make make that happen!". (whispers to himself in the mirror) Oh you want to leave your husband/wive? Take my card. (holds it so it rips) SPLIT! Oh my God, look how easily that card split. That's how easy I'll make it for you! And it's right down the middle so I don't let you get taken to the cleaners by your spouse. Then bam you get every clinent you could've ever dreamed of. If you're gonna profit off the destruction of families you might as well have a laugh while doing it, right? This man is genius, a life ruining/saving genius. When I inevitably get divorced someday I'll be show to give James A.W. Mahon, LL. B. my business. Can't wait to rip that business card, that's when I'll know I truly made it.
via: profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2017/01/10/you-can-get-a-selfie-with-johnny-manziel-in-houston-for-50/
If you’re going to the Super Bowl next month, start saving your pennies.
Johnny Manziel will be in Houston, too, and he’ll be charging for autographs and pictures. Manziel will be at two different Stadium Signatures stores, one on Feb. 2 and one on Feb. 3, to greet fans. Per the Stadium Signatures Facebook page, selfies will cost $50. Manziel will sign any item for $99, and the 2012 Heisman Trophy winner and Browns 2014 first-round pick will personally inscribe those items for an extra $29. Who wouldn’t pay, say, $100 for a selfie with Manziel if he was wearing that infamous Browns quarterback jersey? The Browns released Manziel last March. He’s popped up occasionally on social media and once in Texas court papers when his assault charges were dropped, but he hasn’t been linked to anything related to football since two different agents ditched him last spring.
I don't think the phrase "Life Comes at You Fast" has ever been more appropriate than it has been when talking about Johnny Manziel. His 2012 Heisman Trophy season and the Johnny Football phenomenon feels like it was in another lifetime. It's hard to believe this junky once was beloved, but boy was he.
Johnny Manziel went from no name, to star overnight after he beat Alabama in 2012. It was Johnny football this, Johnny Football that. Everybody was doing the money-sign. It seemed like he was going to be a legend. Johnny won the Heisman and his stock was through the roof. He was a celebrity. He went from partying with the likes of Lebron James, throwing out first pitches at seemingly every stadium in the MLB to stints in rehab and getting cut by the Cleveland Browns. The Cleveland Browns said no thanks to Johnny. The Cleveland Browns. He basically got rejected by the ugliest girl at the bar. The prospects of a 2nd chance for the former first round pick seem bleak at best. After being out of the NFL for a year he's charging 50 bucks a pop for selfies. Which leads me to this. If you spend $50 for a selfie with Johnny Manziel in 2017 you are a certified
For those of you who haven't seen the cinematic masterpiece "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective" Ace is calling you a loser.
You're a loser if you give Johnny Manziel a nickel, let alone 50 bucks for a selfie. If it was even 2015 this wouldn't even be a story. Back when people still thought Johnny cared about football and being in the NFL. He doesn't. It's clear he just wants to party and allegedly hit chicks. I do not like Johnny Manziel at all, he's a spoiled punk brat who had everything given to him and still found a way to fuck it up. Anybody who spends money to help this guy is clown. After a fantastic National Championship game (probably one of the 5 best college football games I've ever watched) Colin Cowherd took to his show "The Herd" to rant and rave about how great sports are. In a lot of ways I agree with him. Sports are awesome. Sports mean a lot to a lot people. They can help bring communities together. One of my favorite examples of that is the 2013 Boston Red Sox and what they did for the city of Boston after a tragedy to help the healing process. Sports are also great because they don't discriminate. At least not as much as before, the best players play. It doesn't matter who you are, the vast majority of the time the best players play. Doesn't matter who you are or where you come from, if you can help the team win that's all that matters. I love sports. Sports are big part of why I started DozOnLife. They're a huge part of my indentity. If I had to describe myself to a total stranger, my love for my teams would be one of the first things I mentioned. However, this take from Colin Cowherd about how great sports are and that he doesn't understand why people like things that "aren't real" is one of the dumbest, and most short sighted things I've ever heard. Again this is coming from me, a man who cried like a baby when Malcolm Butler intercepted Russell Wilson in Super Bowl 49. A man who if you asked me my 10 favorite memories of life, I'd say like 7 are sports related. Have you ever heard of a Renaissance man, Colin? Probably not because you're too busy lying about how you couldn't find 30 seconds to go get chips during a 5 hour game that had a stopage in play every 2 seconds to review a play that didn't need to be reviewed. I think I went to the bathroom 12 times during that game and didn't miss a play. Yes, sports are great, and a lot of what you said in your little rant was true. They make people happy. But so do movies, tv shows, music, and as much as I hate to say it...even books. You sure sound like a lot of fun to hang around though. Cowherd definitely yells at his wife for being stupid after crying from a movie. IT'S NOT EVEN REAL YOU IDIOT! Marley isn't even that dog's REAL name!! Like gtfo of here dude. I love sports, but guess what I also love comedy, I like to laugh. And so do most other normal people on this planet. You don't need everything to be "real". Sometimes the real shit in life fucking sucks and you need to escape for a second. Like you're making it sound like being entertained by a story suddenly makes you a caveman because we're not all as advanced as you for seeing sports as the end all be all. Fuck that. I love sports but you couldn't be more wrong with this take. I love music too Colin and guess what it's all different types of music. I can go from Florence + the Machine, to the Eagles, to Kid Cudi, to the Black Keys, to Backstreet Boys, to Adele without blinking an eye. Yes sports are awesome, but so are a lot of other great things in life and to act like people are crazy for enjoying other things is just such a dumb, outdated look. Cheese pizza is cool but so are other toppings thats all I'm saying. Song: Roll Away Your Stone Artist: Mumford & Sons Album: Sigh No More
If you've been keeping up with me on the f book, or are privileged enough to speak to me on a regular basis in real life then you know last week some potentially life changing moves were made by your boy.
First off I applied for a position at barstool late Tuesday night and heard back the next day. Hearing back that quickly was very surprising (in a good way). I had a phone interview on Friday that went well enough to get a second one at some point this week. Very big progress towards working for my dream company. I don't want to say too much and screw shit up, but I think at the very least I made a new friend on the inside of BSS which is pretty cool. I have no idea what will happen going forward and don't want to get my hopes up too high but one thing is for sure, I am a lot closer to getting where I want to be than I was a week ago. Then on a personal note, you could argue there was even bigger news. Despite being an open book I won't dive too deep into this one either, mainly for her sake and also to not potentially destroy any progress I may or may not have made. But after seemingly missing my chance with this girl I realllly like it appears there was going to be another opportunity after I seemingly ruined that chance. Huge news on both fronts, right? I mean it's the two things I want more than anything in the world and while there's still a lot of work to be done, serious progress was being made. Things that seemed impossible suddenly may not be. So I gotta be at my A game. Be my best Doz. Shit, even my best Ryan. I need my wits and wherewithall to at least put the best effort I can on both fronts. Then Saturday happened. I woke up with the worst feeling in the world, the "I can tell I'm about to get sick" feeling where you're absolutely helpless because you don't feel that bad yet, but know you're about to sick and theres nothing you can do. At that point it's time to prepare for a week or so of not being able to breathe through your nose, sore throats and a lack of energy. So my big question is
Why right now? Why am I so sick for the most important week of my life? What did the doz man do wrong?
How am I supposed to be preparing, and researching for a job when I'm I feel like I'm on death's doorstep? How am I supposed to hang out with a girl when I've transformed into a mouthbreathing, snot-ragging, sore throat having man child? Why is life so hard for ME?? a college educated, white, middle class male in Rhode Island. For a fat guy I'm actually relatively healthy (add the sound of my friends laughing at me), I get sick maybe once a year, I had tests run last year and internally everything is pretty sound for a big man, yet here I am. Chapped-lipped from mouth breathing. When I need my mind, body and spirit all on the same page I get the fucking flu (self-diagnosed). Where do I go from here? I'm trying my best to prepare for the next round of interviews and also bang out some killer blogs, but I just feel like a sack of human garbage. I just want to lay down and watch tv all day. But I can't, Barstool doesn't care that I'm sick. I need to perform and produce. I've tried to fight through it, I've gone out and been around people (maybe not the smartest move) and even have still been going to the gym. Damn, I just realized I'm kind of an ass hole who probably just got a bunch of other people sick, but I'm not gonna let some cold ruin everything I'm going after. So I'm gonna do the only thing I can do: fight through it. I'm not going to be an excuse guy and look for a pity party because I'm sick at probably the worst timing of my life. I'm going to battle for everybody who has ever dealt with an ounce of adversity. This isn't for me, it's for everybody. Song: Knights of Cydonia Artist: Muse Album: Black Holes and Revelations (2006) The first comedy show I ever went to was Jim Gaffigan with my aunt way back in early 2007 in Providence. Great Christmas gift. It was like a week after the Colts cameback and beat the Pats in the AFC championship game and I knew Jim is from Indiana and was very worried there would be some sort of joke ripping the Pats. Gotta remember I was 15 and heartbroken. Luckily he didnt rub the salt in our collective wounds and put on a great show. I love stand up and have seen a bunch of great performers and Jim is one of the best in the business. Tomorrow his fifth hour special, fittingly titled "Cinco" premieres on Netflix and I cannot wait to watch. Whether he's talking about hot pockets, his family or doing his trademark whisper Jim Gaffigan has always been able to make me laugh and this observation about technology has me wicked excited to watch this special tomorrow. Check it out. |
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