I told you last night that I'd be back to give a more in depth take regarding the Mookie news that Felger leaked on his radio program and as a man of my word, here I am.
ICYMI, please watch this video.
I almost wish that I didn't embed that tweet until after I finished typing this blog because just looking at Mookie in a Red Sox uniform tears my heart open like a 2004 Papa Roach song.. I get TRIGGERED, my dude/tte. My five stages of grief have just been denial, anger and depression multiplied by 1.666repeating.
As you'll see many times in this blog, I still cannot fucking believe this is reality. I'm not exaggerating when I say I've spent well over three weeks of my life trying to comprehend out how the Red Sox could actually decide that trading Mookie Betts was in the best interest of the organization. I'm not saying that I spent three straight weeks thinking about it, I'm saying that if you pooled all the time I've been just living my life, minding my own business and a thought like "holy fuck, the Red Sox actually traded Mookie Betts" or "How the hell could you give away such a dynamic player for so little in return?" or "How can you be so fucking stupid? Do you not know anything about the history of this organization?" popped into my head; all those 40 seconds here, 30 minutes there collectively total approximately three weeks of time.
Despite what you may think, I take no pleasure in shitting on the Boston Red Sox for making one of the worst personnel decisions in history of sports. I'd give almost anything to reverse it. I'd even cut my gorgeous hair. I'd bic my head for a year straight to have Mookie back for the rest of his career, call me Dozie Corgan. That's just the kind of hashtag good guy I am.
I loved the Red Sox. Fenway Park was my favorite place on earth. Nothing was hotter to me than an attractive young lady in Red Sox garb.
Up until like eight months ago being a Red Sox fan would be like the 4th thing I'd say to describe myself. Now whether that was a problem itself is for another day, but I've thought about this trade more than I've thought about anything else in 2020. I'm talking more than Covid, more than actively trying to get hired by Barstool #HireDozo, more than my attemptsto get my emotional eating in-check, more than how fucked my family dynamic is right now, more than all thesocial and political unrest in this country, more than how I'm high key in love with someone who will never see me that way, more than how underrated Sweet Chili Doritos are and certainly more than what Orville Peck's real fucking name is.
When it appeared the Red Sox chose saving money over keeping literal generational talent it ruined everything. It's like if you were married someone you absolutely loved for 20 years then they murdered your parents; you don't care how great the first five years were when you're metaphorically standing in a pool of your parent's blood. If you have any self respect you'll leave them, even if deep down you still care. That's how I felt about the Red Sox, that's why I wanted people to Boycott them this year before Covid took care of that for me. 
I felt betrayed. I have loved this team through thick and thin. I've tried to get people my age to realize how awesome baseball is. I spent years of my life loving this team and this is how they repaid me? I'll say it again; that trade ruined everything. It ended almost 20 years of love and devotion. I wanted them to hurt financially for making what appeared to be a purely financial move because there is no defending this move on the field. Mookie did everything you could possibly ask for and they repay him by trading him for a vending machine and used MacBook? It angered me to my core that John Henry had the nerve to write that pity letter to the fans. It drove me insane that years of horrible contracts came to bite them at the worst possible time. I needed someone to channel all my anger at.
Now I'm not saying this news completely makes me forgive the Red Sox. It's not like one minute long clip is going to fix everything; We don't even know if it's fucking true, but nothing would shock me at this point. I'm willing to listen. Are the Red Sox just trying to save face now that the entire world is laughing at them? Or were they really willing to pay Mookie whatever he wanted and he said no thanks like Tom Brady to my autograph request as a tween? I'm not sure, I don't know if we'll ever definitively know unless John Henry decides to be honest for the first time in his life. I'm sure more stuff will leak once the season is over. What I do know is.... if Felger is right, IF the Red Sox were willing to do what it takes to keep Mookie here then of course I have to reconsider all the horrible things I've said about this franchise. Did they really have to pick between looking cheap and being turned down by their own? I don't enjoy not being a Red Sox fan, but for my own sanity I had take to a step back. How can you expect someone to get emotionally and financially invested in a team that would cheap out on someone who had a legitimate chance to be the best player to ever don the uniform? There's literally no point if that's how they're gonna run. Idc about four World Series since 2004, this move destroyed everything; like murdering your spouse's parents. Again, I'm sure this off-season more news will come out as this trade is going to define this franchise for the next 15 (maybe 86) years. All I know is that trading Mookie to save money when you're worth billions is terminate fandom worthy offense, if he straight up wanted to leave then of course I'll have to reconsider my stance. I said throughout this process that if they really were trying to pull a Chapman that I would eat a crow. If the Red Sox genuinely offered Mookie what he wanted and he still wanted out then I'll beg for forgiveness. I don't know if I can believe that, but goT damnit do I want to for my own sanity.
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