"Just sit-ting back on the couch with a bud light,
had a few, now ya boi's feelin alright..."
I'm not gonna subject you to another parody song; at least not right now.
I've already procrastinated enough tonight and need to tell you the good news before the day technically ends. Before I do that, I might as well peel back the curtains of my undiagnosed ADD brain/crippling anxiety :)
If you've been reading DOL for the last few years, you know that it is my life's goal/dream to be a blogger at Barstool Sports; #HireDozo. I referenced this in a blog last week with the all or nothing Barstool Roulette Wheel that I would 100% spin.
After I got out of work this afternoon, on the drive to getting my brows threaded, I told my mom I was done living in my head and that I was finally gonna email Coley (Barstool EIC) some samples, maybe even a cover letter.
By the time I went to a different location to attempt to get a quick trim since my hair is getting so long it's uncomfortable to sleep, went into the mall, saw that the hair place was "cash only", walked to the other end of the mall to the ATM, took out $60 of my own money for $3, started walking back, contemplated checking out the 3 used DVD for $5 bin at FYE before ultimately deciding that's probably not the smartest idea during a pandemic, continuing walking back, saw that the hairdresser had already put the gates down to close up shop at least 17 minutes early because I was too awkward to say I need to go get cash when I saw the "cash only" sign, left the mall, drove to Dave's Marketplace to pick up dinner, walked around Dave's aimlessly debating whether or not to get pizza, got two slices of CBR and drove home; I was pooped.
That "I hate teaching in the Creative Capital, I'm done making excuses" energy, quickly turned into just wanting to unwind and push it off until tomorrow mode.
Once I got home, instead of starting the email/finishing the second half of my "Dear @ColeyMick," blog that's been my drafts since October I did the following; Went 3-2 (made two guys quit early) in online Madden with Taysom Hill while watching 5ish episodes of It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia (season 2) that I've already seen before on TV2, vacuumed the living room and my bedroom, cut my hairs that were wrapped around the bottom of said vacuum, trimmed my beard AND managed to spend at least an hour analyzing my Apple Music year-end data because I do not for one second believe the data is accurate.
On a totally unrelated to this blog's original topic tangent...do plays only count if you let a song play entirely? Cause I'm a notorious skip the last few seconds guy (undiagnosed ADD, duh). There's no way I only listened to "Deacon Blues" 36 times this year. I had a ride home from work where I listened to five straight times. Plays should be like baseball; if you get over halfway through, its official.
As for the reason I wrote this blog in the first place; I had not one, but two positive #HireDozo moments on social media today that threw a few "keep going" logs on my "don't give up" fire. To think how low I was yesterday, these simple engagements totally made my day.
The first was an IG comment like by Brendan Clancy aka Super Producer BC on a post about staying dedicated to the content game.
Talk about a post tailored to me....one of the biggest reasons I want to write for Barstool (apart from it being my dream job and what I was put on this planet to do) is to stick it to my old man and everybody else who hasn't been 100% supportive of me in my pursuits. I know I'm talented and it kills me to not have the support of the people I care most about. I work fucking hard at this and think that my honesty and vulnerability about how my weird, beautiful, fucked up brain can sometimes hinder my creative process and cause me to second guess every keystroke, as I try to achieve my dream, just shows my authenticity as a writer/personality.
In case you're reading this and are like "who tf is Brendan Clancy?" I'll fill you in. Brendan is a full time Barstool employee and KFC's older brother. Dude is Barstool AF. His brand is helping people get podcasts and content started. I listened to him on early KFC Radio for years; big fan.
I'm pretty sure he just liked every comment on that post, but even that is okay to me because I straight up just said #HireDozo. I know that at the very least, he knows I'm a living human-being; he followed my twitter during the #43Burgers saga and as of 11:19PM on December 1st, 2020 is still one of my 85 followers (I'm probz muted lol) AND now he's well aware of #HireDozo....the hashtag brings you to all my IG content. Maybe he clicked?
The fact that he liked a comment that was just #HireDozo makes me super happy and gives me some much needed hope. In my brain that's an endorsement!
The second positive #HireDozo moment was when The Dozen Trivia twitter account acknowledged my near perfect score in today's Dozen.
In case you're unfamiliar; The Dozen is a Barstool trivia competition show and every day on their IG story they post 12 trivia questions. I usually play them during my morning poop or in the teacher's lounge before school. I normally am a 7-10 right guy, but today I started off 9-9 and got 10 wrong because I misread the question before answering 11 and 12 correctly. In my tweet to @TheDozenTrivia I dropped a #HireDozo and they still retweeted me. My second guessing ass is always worried about being too annoying with the #HireDozo, but I hear stories about how persistent Barstool employees were in their attempts to get hired, so I keep flooding people's timeline with it.
I don't want to just be some no name blogger at Barstool when I'm working there. I want to have my toes in a little bit of everything and let my true self shine. One thing I really want to do is flex my weird, beautiful, fucked up brain and all the trivia knowledge its chosen to retain over people's names and historical knowledge I spent 30 grand on not learning. I plan to dominate trivia.
I know it's not an offer sheet, but it's a lot better than where I was yesterday.
I gotta say, today was a good day (for the #HireDozo Movement).
P.S. Saturday wasn't too bad either. 6K views on the Dozo-scale is approximately 600,000.
I was gonna blog this, but it's after midnight and I'm exhausted... Jayson Tatum fixed his missing apostrophe tattoo! It low key looks like Rhode Island.
Ultra-rare Triple P.S.
Pro-Football-Reference liked my Happy Birthday shoutout too.