If you've been keeping up with the blog, you know yesterday was the 10 year anniversary of my high school graduation. Throughout all the reminiscing and catching up with classmates, I found this performance from my classes Junior Variety Show in the spring of 09. I timed my first major weight loss perfectly, as I was skinny for our V-show AND prom, but fat again by the end of football season!
My class didn't have a host for our show; we did "transitions". One of them the second night was when three of my classmates (one of whom was the best signer in the school) and I sang Wonderwall. Honestly, my classes Variety Show was a major disappointment. With the amount of funny people in my grade, we could've done so much better... but straight up, I laugh every time I watch this (I'll tell the truth; I've rewatched five times since yesterday). This was not planned at all as you can tell; it sort of just happened. Call me Dozie Gallagher. Enjoy.
I've been saying it for years (Maybe months? Who can keep track anymore?) but Don't Look Back in Anger is 6847208012842809354364128709417 times better than Wonderwall.
Dave Chappelle performed live in Ohio on June 6th to a temperature screened, alcohol free, socially distanced audience in what is the first real "comedy" special since Covid. While there's a few laughs sprinkled in this is not a comedy special; it's more like secular sermon. 8:46 lasts less than a half hour, but Dave still find a way to address what's going on in this country with racism, police brutality and overall injustice (like Laura Ingraham's racist ass). The power of numbers is in this special is eerie AF; you'll see what I'm talking about. I am using the hashtag must watch label for this special. The fact that Netflix put this on youtube for free speaks volumes.
Today is June 11th, 2020. On June 11th, 2010 I graduated from a public high school in the United States of America. Because I graduated high school, I have ELITE subtraction skills. So that's exactly ten years ago, TODAY. As a history major (in college), I learned that a 10 year span is commonly referred to as a decade. Ipso facto; I'm a decade out of high school. That's a decade out in the "real world" (although I consider it closer to half of that since I graduated college in 2015 and I went to school like 15 minutes away from my then home). Being 10 years out of high school is a strange feeling that I am going to try to express here via the written word.
Before I fully turn onto Nostalgia Lane, we should get a little serious. I make light of death and other serious topics for a lot of reasons, but mainly to take away the power they have over my consciousness (it DOES NOT work that effectively), but surviving these 10 years is an accomplishment in itself. We're still alive. There was a lot of times I didn't think I would be. With all we've been learning (or may have already known) about privilege lately, we should not take that for granted. Unfortunately, two people I went to high school with are no longer with us.
R.I.P. Austin and Alex.
I've tried to stay somewhat anonymous on DOL, but the fact of the matter is the majority of my readers know exactly who I am and where I'm from (I'm still going to be semi-vague for their privacy). Someday that will not be the case, but you probably know my government name and where I went to high school. I have tried to keep Ryan Last Name and Doz/Dozah/Dozo/Dozan/Dozie/Dozer (if you're a POS like my Lax Coach lolol) separate since everybody tells me I need to have a backup plan if #HireDozo is never #HiredDozo. Deep down I know it's only a matter of time until I get where I want to be, so the lines between the real me and my blogger persona have blurred as I have started to put my face out there to help grow my brand.
I LOVED being in high school, dude. In a lot of ways it shaped who I am today. Nearly all my friends that I'm still close with to this day are from high school; most from my grade. HS was some of the happiest times of my life, but I am soooooo grateful that I am not the same Dozah I was in 2006-2010.
After going to four different middle schools in four years, it was nice to settle into a community and make some real friends. Like basically everybody else who's ever lived; I just wanted to be liked and accepted for me. Sadly, I made that reality difficult for some people I went to school with because of my own ass hole actions. I want to apologize to anybody whose feelings I may have hurt in high school. I was going through a lot of emotional pain and needed to bring others down to put myself up. (I'm Robin in this situation)
It's weird. You spent nearly everyday with these all people for four years (sometimes longer depending how long you've been in the district) then it's just over. Time for the next thing. There's people I had class with everyday who I haven't seen in 10 years. That's wild to me. It's almost like a warm up for death.
As someone who's not super close with their extended family, my friends became my family. Sure we roasted each other to the point that it could ruin any of our lives, but there was also a lot of love. I still love many to this day. I don't know how to say this without sounding like a douche bag, but I was pretty popular. It didn't suck. I had a lot of friends and people who liked me (or pretended to like me). Don't get me wrong, it was a small ass school, it's not that big of a deal. I was a big fish in a bathtub. I was still fat and my-awkward-ass self, so I was the recipient of a fair share of bullying (I once got shoved into an ice cream machine so hard that it changed the language), but I had a v positive experience overall. I know not everybody is as lucky.
I took great pride in being an athlete and representing my hometown while in HS. I loved being a Mariner. I played football and watched lacrosse while rockin' a jersey and shin guards. One of my proudest memories of high school is the first time Jimbo announced me entering a varsity game for my first meaningful snaps as a sophomore. I felt like I had arrived, that it was my time. 5-8 was here. We started 0-3 my sophomore year, but won 4 straight after I entered the line-up to make Thanksgiving a defacto playoff game. We lost 35-0 lolol.
All I wanted to do in high school was win a state championship. That was my only goal that didn't involve girls. I didn't care about anything except getting to the highest level in Division III high school football and/or Division II/1B (depending on the year) in lax; to a point where I literally cried to get back on the lax team. When I graduated a ring-less failure I needed to fill that void somehow. I was angry for a years about how things played out. I was holding on to a lot of hate and resentment.
I still haven't really talked about it that much publicly, because it involves one of my best friends that I have already hurt enough with my actions, but it's an important experience in my development as a man. I was a starting offensive lineman my junior year. I played RT then moved to RG after our first game because I was more suited (fat) for the interior of the o line. Sophomore year I played a ton as the 6th lineman; we had two packages Mariner and Mariner Big where I would come in to replace a guard who would move to fullback. It became almost our base offense late in the year. So I had been playing and starting for basically two seasons. I was an important member of the team; I was a key returner in the paper going into my senior year and a key loss after I graduated. But my junior year of football is hands down my favorite part of high school; it's also the most bittersweet.
When we got to the playoffs my junior year I didn't start because an injured player came back. I was relegated to first man in and protector on the newly added FG/PAT team after our coaches realized we had a guy who can bang from 45 yards in late November..
Even though I was starting before the returning player got hurt, I was the odd man out when he returned since I had moved to guard from tackle. In the days leading up to that game I did something I have rarely done before in my life; I stood up for myself. I told our coaches they were making a mistake. That we would lose the game if I didn't play because of my friend's suspect snapping at center that had already cost us a game in the regular season. In their defense, I think I took about 300 yards off our running back's rushing total from holding penalties, but he was the dick who bullied me so I don't lose sleep over it. He called me Kevin and hit me (sometimes a backhand graze in a homo-erotic way) in the balls every day for three years.
Anyways, I told my coaches they should bench our C and move our LG to C; he came up as a C but moved to LG because our eventual running back was center at the time. (I hope I haven't lost you yet lol). While the coaches agreed I was one of the five best OL on the team, they said they just didn't feel comfortable moving someone to C for the playoffs, but to be ready to play. I was devastated. I had worked so hard and cared so much about this team and had it taken away from me when it mattered most. Winning a ring was all that mattered to me and to not have anything to do with what happened on the field fucking ruined me. I knew this was my best chance at a championship. I talked with my OL coach even more after the meeting; he could tell I was crushed and tried to cheer me up. I told him how much I wanted to win and I just felt like what they were doing was not right for the team. I still regret to this day that I didn't say anything during the game because high snaps fucked up the flow of our offense all night. I believe it's a major (but by no means the only) reason we lost that game. As much as that entire ordeal sucked in real time; it taught me a lot about life.
I tell that story because losing that game where I had almost no impact (I didn't play until late in the 4th after an injury when the game was already at hand....I was soooo mad during because I was dominating my man once I got in) on the result shaped who I became post-high school. It heavily influenced my decisions for life after graduation. I loved playing football and being in high school, so I figured I'd become a teacher in order to coach high school football and eventually win that ring that I wanted/needed so badly. I've referenced this before, but as you get older, your priorities change. There's other things I care way more about in life, but I'd be lying if I said it didn't bother me sometimes. Over time I've accepted there's a lot more important things in life than high school football.
When I graduated in 2010 I thought about retiring the whole "Dozah persona" to start fresh "I went away" to college. It was impossible. Going to college down the street from where I lived was basically extended high school. I was bitter and angry. I felt like I was going there against my will. I didn't have many options going out of high school; I had my choice of URI, RIC or CCRI since my dad was not about that out of state tuition life.
I've known since my junior year of college that I didn't want to be a teacher for the rest of my life. I got into the field for the wrong reasons. I cared way more about football and the fun parts of high school (sports, hanging out with my friends, getting rejected by every girl I had a crush on, pooling our money together to buy a 20 sack, parties, dances, lunch, secretly getting drunk at sleepovers, spirit week, art, summers off and the bell ringing at 1:52 pm). I didn't want to start over and I didn't have the blessing of my tuition donor; I felt trapped.
While I was in college, especially early in college there was this pressure to put high school in the rear view. For a few years it was almost taboo to mention high school sports or memories. It's not like we didn't do it, but idk...it felt like you would be judged for liking those awesome times in your life and reminiscing. Like you were living it the past; it wasn't cool to still care. That was yeeeaaars ago, bro.
We were supposed to "move on", but who I was in high school defined who I thought I was. I was Dozah. I really struggled with the transition. I didn't move on because I didn't know how to. I was terrified of being the guy who peaked in high school, but I was doing everything to make that a reality. I went from feeling like somebody who mattered in high school, to a nobody in college. It was not easy for me. I had hopes of becoming a campus legend who everybody knew and that totally didn't happen (although I did create URIprobs which at its peak had nearly 6,000 followers). Instead of making new friends in college and branching out, I stole my best friend/teammate's girlfriend (who I also went to high school with) when he moved away for school and totally bombed my first three semesters. Sometimes I wonder if revenge for football played a role in my actions? I honesty don't know cause I was pretty drunk but if I had to put money on it I'd say yes. Ironically, I probably did him the biggest favor in the world and the relationship fucked me up way worse, so jokes on Dozo. My resentment and anger from everything ended up costing me. I was getting C-'s in the easy gen ed, GPA boosters which made the rest of college much more challenging. It's like I was starting on 1st and 25. In retrospect, this taught me the importance of loyalty. I never want to make someone hurt like I made my brother hurt. In a lot of ways I was hurting myself more.
It's difficult to wrap my head around the fact that an entire decade has passed since Graduation. I still feel so young, but like I've accomplished nothing. Sometimes I think of myself as a failure because of my bank statement or Linkedin page. I can't believe when I was like 25 I used to be like "omg I'm so old".
I'm going to say this to everybody I went to school with; WE'RE NOT. We still have so much fucking time.
I still struggle with my self worth constantly. What if this blog doesn't get me the job I think will give me the life I was born to live? Will anybody ever love Ryan instead of Doz? Why do I constantly feel so inadequate? I feel like a failure because I haven't accomplished much professionally and have essentially no money to my name, but everything that has happened to me both during and post high school has turned me into the man I am today. A man I am proud to be. I know I was a dickhead classclown in school who used a lot of words you can't say anymore, but we were fucking kids. Sadly, kids who documented everything on the infancy of facebook. All of the joy and pain I felt in 2006-2010 and 2010 to now shaped me to who I am. Whether you liked high school or not; it shaped you too. Maybe you're nothing like the person you were, but every decision you have ever made has put you into where you currently are.
I really am trying to live without regret despite referencing a regret earlier; Maybe had I not gotten benched and we won it all I could've partied too hard and died in a car wreck? If I didn't steal my best friend's girl, maybe we wouldn't be as close as we are today? Even though I didn't get the results I wanted when I talked to the coached, at least I did it. I didn't pussy out. I fought for myself.
I'm not going to lie and say I don't care about money because I do. We all need it to survive. I'm stressing about cash as I type, but it is not what motivates me. I care about being a better person and contributing member of society. Money and jobs can come and go in the blink of an eye. The person you are shouldn't. I care far more about my own happiness, the people I love and being the best Ryan/Doz I can be. Money is a necessary evil, but we cannot let it define us. Growing up in a rich, beach town we are taught to judge people based on possessions or status. Judging could've been a core class at NHS with how much time we spent doing it. One thing I have been consciously trying to improve on is how judgmental I've been. You don't know what other's struggles are. It really is just so much better to go through life happy and with a positive attitude. In the last year I have learned the power of your mindset. We are in control of so much more than we realize. You never know how much an insignificant moment to you can matter to someone else.
As the years have blended together like random fruits I used throw in my nutribullet, I have a harder time remembering stories from high school. Sure, part of that is the reefer and suppression to deal with existence, but a lot of it is from letting stories die. From my virtual yearbook on my personal IG last night I had at least two dozen people reach out and bring up something from high school; mostly shit I forgot. Like when our librarian faked her own death.
All we have is our stories; how they get passed on generation to generation has changed, but the concept remains the same. I used to be able to tell you everything that happened in a given day, or every play in a game, but overtime those memories fade when they are not brought back to life through talking and reminiscing. Yes, there is way more to life than high school, but it's also one of the most important parts of your life and I'm not ashamed to admit that it was for me. We shouldn't be embarrassed to admit we had a lot of fun or miss it at times.
When I think about what I really miss, it's the connections and friendships. That friend group that was my family has their own families. Growing apart from people I considered family was devastating. I miss seeing the people I care about on a daily basis and being a part of each others lives. I know we all grow up and move on, but from reaching to people during Covid and the Revolution I've remembered how many people mean so much to me. I hate that I feel so alone. I hope it doesn't last forever. I want to make my fellow alums proud. I pray that I write for Barstool someday to keep our stories alive. I am a funny mother fucker with a heart of gold. I just want to make a positive impact on this planet and I truly believe my writing is that avenue. A lot of our lasting memories of each other may be who we were in high school. Personally, that worries me because my paranoid ass thinks some may still be upset for things I said or did back in the day to get a cheap laugh in class. Just know I am not the same kid I was back then.
I really hope we'll be able to have some sort of reunion this year when life gets a little more normal. There's so many people I want to see and catch up with. There is so much more to life than high school and I intend to experience more of that in the next 10 years, but it's okay to look back on the glory days to keep those stories alive; like the time I got a technical foul as the Mascot senior year. Happy Anniversary NHS Class of 2010. We're still here. I have nothing but love for you all.
All that being said. We are absolute losers for picking the FARMVILLE THEME SONG as our class song.
Zach Braff has said there could be a Scrubs movie in the pipeline, if series creator Bill Lawrence and Disney, who own the show via ABC, would be interested in the idea.
The sitcom ran from 2001 to 2010 on NBC, focusing on the lives of trainee doctors and nurses at the fictional Sacred Heart Hospital.
On Fake Doctors, Real Friends, a podcast hosted by Braff and his co-star Donald Faison in which they rewatch the show, Braff said of a movie: “We talk about that, because I point to Psych, who’s now made 2 successful films. It would be fun.
“I think it would be fun for us to all do something like that. We just have to get Disney to be into it and Bill Lawrence to be into it. I think it will happen; the fans seem to really want it to happen.”
Braff recently told the BBC he thinks Scrubs is “way too un-PC”, admitting some of the comedy might read differently when watched today.
“Some of it is way too un-PC, I’m sure, for now,” Braff said. “We often cringe and go okay, you definitely couldn’t do that joke today.
“Sometimes even at the time things would get censored because the creators were trying to push things as far as they could on network television.”
During quarantine I've done a lot of independent research, but I've also done my fair share of watching internet tv too. During said internet tv time, I started rewatching Scrubs on Hulu. It was my go-to multi-task background stream while I lead the Boston Celtics to back-to-back NBA Titles.
I have forgotten a lot about my upbringing, but one thing I know for a fact is that I loved Scrubs when it was on in real time. I definitely wasn't watching when it first started in 2001, but I have evidence of my excitement for a new episode during my freshmen year of high school.
Scrubs ended my senior year after a gimmicky med school 9th season, but for like seven and a half of those nine seasons it was IMO one of the best shows on TV.
During my rewatch, I have listened to Fake Doctors, Real Friends, but I'm super behind...I'm in the 6th season of my rewatch and on like episode three of the podcast. Once I'm driving more I'll be able to bang it out (Pardon My Take is the only podcast I listen to that I have kept up with 100% during C).
Donald and Zach are spot on about some of the jokes definitely not holding up; most notably Dr. Cox always calling J.D. a girl's name as an insult. The trans community would stop that dead in its tracks today. Much like "Paging Dr. F@ggot" in the Hangover, these aren't really jokes as much they are insults/hateful statements. As much as they may offend now, that's just sort of how it was back then. Everybody was making hacky gay jokes every five minutes in tv and movies until like 2014. I'm not saying it's right, but you have to judge with the times. I don't want to see #CANCELDRCOX or #DRCOXISOVERPARTY trending on twitter. Instead we should use it as a jumping off point for a discussion about why that isn't acceptable anymore. History happens everyday. F@ggot isn't a punchline. I am all for making jokes of any type; remember that whole first amendment thing? I don't think gay jokes or jokes involving gender should be off limits, but there needs to be some sort of wit or thought behind it; like Dave Chappelle's alphabet people bit. I think the writers on Scrubs could easily find a way to bring Dr. Cox to 2020 while still being funny and staying true to the character.
While the article or podcast conversation doesn't seem to be past the "it would be awesome to do a Scrubs movie" phase; at least that's a start! In the few episodes I have heard Bill Lawrence is praised seemingly every three minutes; perhaps there's a buttering up situation taking place to get the gears in motion??
With streaming services out the wazoo there$ $o many way$ to make this happen. I don't know if it's right for Disney +, but I'm sure you guys can figure all that out. My job is write opinions. After hearing how ridiculous ABC is with not allowing Zach Braff to keep Rowdy, I can't lie I'm a little worried this won't happen. But reunion shows are often just be money grabs that don't add much to the story. I'm sure if they can make enough money of it, it'll happen. I think a show as beloved as Scrubs, with so many great characters (R.I.P. Sam Lloyd) needs a 10 year update in movie form. It would be a great way to kill 90-120 minutes someday. Make it happen @peoplewhocanmakeithappen!!
If you have a twitter account, you've tweeted something stupid. We all have at some point, I sure know I have. Since I average about .35 likes per tweet, I often forget about the power I have in my pocket, but any inconsequential, trivial thought could potentially be seen by millions.
I wonder if this guy, Scott knew that before sending out this tweet to Rage Against The Machine guitarist Tom Morello yesterday?
This is such an outrageous tweet that maybe he's the one being ironic? Does he know who he's tweeting at? What was he listening to before? Did he get Rage Against the Machine confused New Kids on the Block? I cannot believe a real person with a brain (there's a chance it wasn't!) said that. How does his vote count as much as mine or yours? How out of touch can on person be? Has anybody ever been more late to the party than Scottie boy? What exactly did you think that name was in reference to?
(After I tweeted that out I saw many similar jokes; I swear none influenced me...it's not exactly the most difficult quip to think of, but it gets the point across! Also, his tweet is deleted when I look at twitter on my laptop, but that still shows up on my phone....weird!)
I guess it's a simple mistake. I mean how could someone think there's some sort of political message behind this?
Luckily, Tom Morello was nice enough to let Scott in on his little secret that Rage Against the Machine's music addresses political and social issues.
Ken Jennings from the top rope!!!!
I still don't understand how saying Black Lives Matter and police brutality should stop is somehow a political issue and not a basic human rights issue, but here we are. Scott Castaneda, i'm sorry to break it to you, but Rage Against the Machine has contained "political bs" from their first note. Tough break bro, there's always Franz Ferdinand.
Gronk (and the Bucs) is (are) Replacing All of the Football Equipment that a Tampa High School Lost in a Fire
TAMPA, Fla. (WFLA) – Rob Gronkowski is new to the Tampa Bay area but is already stepping up to help out a local school.
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers tight end announced Tuesday he and his new team are going to replace a storage shed that was burned down at Blake High School last month. They’re also replacing all of the football equipment that was inside the shed.
“The Gronk Nation Youth Foundation and my new team – the Tampa Bay Buccaneers – are all about helping youth reach their full potential. So we’re gonna do just that,” Gronkowski said in a video message posted to Twitter. “To the Blake High School Yellow Jackets, you’re getting a brand new storage unit and new football equipment to replace everything that was lost, courtesy of our foundation and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers Foundation.”
How fitting is it that on 6/9 day (June 9th) Rob Gronkowski is in the news?
After a fire destroyed an equipment shed at Howard W. Blake High School in Tampa it appeared their 2020 football season was in limbo (not that it probably wasn't already with C). That was until Rob Gronkowski and the Bucs stepped in.
The way he says "sadly, they lost it all" made me laugh. SORRY!
Gronk still may not be the best on screen speaker, but what matters is his actions! This is a fantastic act of kindness by Gronk's Foundation (and the Bucs too). This shows a lot about the character of Rob Gronkowski; stepping up during hard times to help out his new community during a time of need. What a guy! Much like another former Boston athlete; David Price... Gronk is stepping up to help in an area new to him.
Corona is obviously affecting all of us, but I feel especially badly for kids in school. These are years and moments you cannot get back. With the 10 year anniversary of my high school graduation coming up on Thursday (PERFECT tbt timing) I've been reminiscing a lot more than usual. I've referenced my wildly disappointing season senior of H.S. football many a time on this publication... As much as that year sucked in real time and in retrospect...at least I had the opportunity...the only thing worse would to have been not being able to play because of something out of my control. First corona, then a fire, I pray for the heads of these players pets. We all need some good news and it's great to see Gronk making such a positive contribution on surely his favorite day of the year. How can this reaction not bring a smile to your face?
It's no surprise Gronk is helping out. He's always been a big charity/do the right thing guy. I don't think I've ever seen his hair this long before. Dude has been shaving his head for cancer every summer for as long as I can remember. I wonder if he's bringing that to Tampa too?
Blogs have not been super fun lately, life has not been super fun lately, but here on DOL we must keep moving forward. I'm sort of unique because I do not like being sad (despite what my musical choices may tell you). I'll be honest, I'm sad AF rn. I don't want to alarm anybody, but yeah it's tough to be souped rn. I know I'm not alone here. I believe absorbing something light/positive/funny/happy to bring you some sort of joy on a daily basis is significant for improving mental health during these uncertain times.
I am a big believer in the content pallet cleanser! What's that? Basically I never go to bed right after watching something that is scary/negative/bums you tf out; even if it's a show I love. Take 13 Reasons Why Season 4 which just came out for example! After I watched the first episode Sunday night I had to watch old Super Bowl highlights on Youtube for three hours to sleep that night.
Life around us is pretty sad right now, unless you're one of the billionaires profiting off of anguish and despair. If you fall in that camp you might as well leave right now because a show leaving Hulu doesn't concern you...but one of the funniest and most under-appreciated comedies of all time, Nathan For You is leaving Hulu in 10 days.
I'm talking regular days, not business. The clock is ticking.
Not to go full pretenious hipster here, but I too graduated with really good grades and was one of the (on average) 448,000 people who watched Nathan For You in the first season. I have been a fan from the jump and have tried to get people to check it out since 2013. Nathan For You certainly isn't for everybody, but if you enjoy some good ole fashion cringe comedy in a business casual setting than this is the program for you. This man is a comedic genius.
With the hustle and bustle of life during a pandemic and social revolution; while 10 days is ample time to finish the series in its entirety, I'm not trying to pressure you. I'm simply here to let the readers know the clock is ticking.
To make things easier for you, as a man of the people I am going to give my personal recommendation of 10 episodes of Nathan For You you must/should watch before it's too late. Nathan For You lasted for four seasons from 2013-2017; with no season in 2016. There's 31 episodes and one special; so if you do enjoy, you're already 31.25% of the way there if you take heeded of my advice. I'm listing these episodes in chronological order; there's no 1-10 here.... because like a lot of bands I like...this list could change by the minute, but as of 6/9/20 these are the 10 I'm suggesting.
Season 1, Episode 1: Yogurt Shop/Pizzeria
You gotta watch the first episode to truly understand what this series is truly about; helping struggling businesses. Nathan's outside of the box approach usually drums up interest and hype around a product or company. In episode one he hits the ground running by introducing a 100% fecal-free poop flavoured (in honor of his Canadian citizenship) frozen yogurt and a free pizza giveaway.
Season 1, Episode 3: Clothing Store/Restaurant
Nathan suggests a marketing strategy that allows attractive people to shoplift from a clothing store. How does one determine "what is attractive?" tune in and find out.
His fedora and the beautiful shop owner should be enough to reel you in, but this is also the episode that we are introduced to Simon the Security Guard. I don't wanna spoil everything, but his interactions with the restaurant owner he helps in the second half of the episode are elite awkward comedy.
Season 1, Episode 4: Gas Station/Caricature Artist
Nathan offers a gas rebate to any customers willing to go through hell AND helps a struggling artist use shock and stereotypes to increase sales.
Season 1, Episode 5: Haunted House/The Hunk
IMO this is the best episode of the series. Both subplots are hilarious. We meet Anthony Napoli and Peter J Marx, Esq.
Are you a good guy?
Season 1, Episode 8: Private Investigator/Taxi Company
As someone who's driven for Uber I love the conversation idea, but the meat and potatoes of this episode is every single thing about Nathan and Brian Wolfe's relationship. Be sure to leave a review for DOL on Yelp after you finish this blog.
Season 2, Episode 5: Dumb Starbucks
This is the episode that taught me everything I know about Parody Law! Widely considered Nathan's best work by critics. We also get some more Peter J Marx, Esq. in this episode.
Season 2, Episode 7: Taxi Service/Hot Dog Stand
This episode Nathan suggests free rides to the pregnant will increase business after one gives birth in one of the taxis AND teaches a liar a lesson that they'll NEVER forget. The interaction with the taxi owner is one of the funniest of the entire series. This episode is all-time confrontation comedy.
Season 3, Episode 1: Electronics Store
His date alone earns this a spot on this vague ass list. I'd love to know what happens afterwards regarding two people in this episode.
Season 4, Episode 4: The Anecdote
(I couldn't find clips from the episode on Youtube, so here's the actual anecdote itself). This episode is a behind the scenes look at Nathan's formulation of the perfect talk show story.
Season 4, Episode 5: Shipping Logistics Company
Nathan attempts to rebrand Smoke Detectors as "Blues Smoke Detectors" so they can avoid tariffs. The detail in his outfits as a band manager alone warrants a watch. If I was power ranking episodes this is in my top 5.
There's so many other great episodes of this amazing show, but like I said; I understand time is of the essence. If you do finish the entire series in the next 10 days, more power to you. There's so many great ones that I didn't include. Most notably Season 3, Episode 2; this is the episode that introduces us to Summit Ice...perhaps the best thing to come out of the series. Few people on this planet have the comedic talents of Nathan Fielder. I don't know where Nathan For You is going after it leaves Hulu, but wherever it may end up I just hope everybody can find the time to appreciate this masterpiece.
Over the weekend there were at least three organized peaceful protests against police brutality in my home state of Rhode Island. I was present at two of them. Like millions of other Americans, I am fed up with institutional racism in our country. I've seen it first hand, as both a teacher and during my summer as a collector for an electric company. I've done some writing on DOL about what's going on in the U.S. , but I felt like I had to be there. I wanted to be there. I don't want to be on the wrong side of history and in my heart I knew going was the right thing to do; despite my initial reservations.
I'm naturally always a little scared as a factory setting, I'm scared as I write this blog. So I'd be lying if I told you I wasn't a little worried on Friday. I didn't tell my parents I was going because I didn't want them to worry either. Surprise! I'm 28 years old and care about humanity enough to protest.
Part of me felt weird using that filter on the one photo I posted of myself, but it was to represent the closeness I felt with everybody getting behind something so important.
I get really uncomfortable in large crowds; especially after PVDfest last year and Covid now (in three weeks we're gonna know one way or another if there's going to be a "second wave"). When I was in college and frequenting bars that often broke fire-codes (R.I.P. Chucks) I was always aware of potential exit points in a crowd. Plus, I have a twitter account. I've seen what has happened and how quickly a peaceful protest can turn violent. Call me soft for not wanting to lose an eye to a rubber bullet if you must. I'm just a die-hard fan of depth perception.
When you see it was a youth group that put together the Providence protest, the magnitude of this issue really hits home. Kids did this. They were the ones who kept things calm and were telling people to leave so they wouldn't break curfew and risk harm. There's a reason I deep down still believe in public education, despite how much a broken system has broken my spirits.
Powerful is such an elementaryish word, that I've heard a thousand times this weekend...I said it at least 200 times myself to describe what I witnessed. These protests were so fucking powerful. I took a knee in silence for nearly nine minutes with a few hundred people to pay our respect to George Floyd. I saw 8th graders give heartfelt speeches and grown men cry. I saw men, women and children break down while telling stories of what they've witnessed and experienced. It's devastating.
How can these first hand accounts from African Americans not break your heart? (don't answer that) We have people begging us to have the decency to treat them like people and there's actually a shit load of people who have a problem with that. This is all about equality. If equality doesn't exist for all then it doesn't really exist for anybody. These systems and practices have simply been going on for too long and must stop. A speaker in Prov referenced the bias in the criminal justice system when it comes to sentencing. Two men who committed the same crime got drastically different sentences based on their race. I believe she said one got 26 years and the another got 3. I'll let you guess who was who.
Despite the overall negativity of the last paragraph, this weekend warmed my heart. Seeing how many people peacefully showed up to fight against police brutality this weekend made me hopeful. Apparently my initial estimation of 100,000 people in Providence was just a little off.
When you're in the middle of a sea of humans; it feels like 100,000+. Like I said, I'm not afraid to admit I was worried about going to Prov. Big crowds outside of a structured environment (sporting event, concert) scare the shit out of me. A mass shooting is always in the back of my mind. I said this to my friend who invited me and I'll tell it to you right now "There's a lot of shit that black people go through everyday that is scary that I wouldn't think twice about. One day that might be a little scary is the least I can do." Yes, I was inspired by Remember the Titans (a movie everybody should watch/re-watch in these times).
Social Media during protests is a weird line to walk because on one hand; you want to share what you've witnessed with the world, but on the other hand you don't want to look like you're using the protests "for clout". Like all things in life there's a spectrum; at the end of the day if you want to post a pic of you and your friends at a protest just make sure you're both there and doing it for the right reasons. I personally think it can be in bad taste, but I'm sure I do a lot of things that people think are in bad taste. What is undeniable is how disgusting influencers at protests in the literal wake of carnage are.
While I did share about a minute of video from the steps of the State House on my IG story, I didn't take a lot of footage of either protest I attended. This was all so much bigger than me or this stupid blog that I have put all my eggs into. I was in the moment; part of history. It really felt like I was part of something bigger than myself and I wanted to soak it in. I saw some people I haven't seen in years. I was pleasantly surprised by some of the faces I saw in the crowd.
With everything I just said, please allow me to share a few photos of signs that I/my friends took this weekend that broke up the seriousness of the event. There's some parts of the protests that aren't funny, but I'm sorry life is inherently funny. IDFW policing comedy. Humor is a great coping mechanism and can make it easier to deal with the fucked up experience that is human life. For example: I am all for kneeling, but I was a much bigger fan of the 8:46 kneel in the grass that I experienced at the G@nsett protest. In Providence we were taking a knee every two minutes like a Catholic Mass. Up, down, up, down, up, down. As a large man who was positioned on titles you can imagine the pain I was in. I eventually had to sit Native American style to avoid falling and creating an all-time bad moment for a game of human dominoes.
I saw a lot of creativity at the protest. I applaud creativeness, after all we were in the Creative Capital. Of course there's nothing wrong with a "Black Lives Matter" sign at these protests and I'm glad there were so many, but it's just in my D.N.A. to be a little different. These signs really captured my attention for various reasons that I will explain under each picture.
"Racism Is So American That When You Protest it, People Think You Are Protesting America"
I feel like I saw this one on twitter before Friday, but it's so good and thought provoking that it had to be included. THIS ISN'T ABOUT THE FLAG OR THE MILITARY!!! If you cannot separate the flag from this issue PLEASE open your fucking eyes and ears.
"Police Brutality & Racism is the Smallest Dick Energy"
It's not about having a big piece, boys. It's about your energy and vibe!!! Police Brutality and Racism ain't it, chief. Loving everybody and treating people with respect is Teddy Bridgewater energy!!
"Rememeer In November"
Part of me is so fucking paranoid that I feel like this is some big political statement that is going over my head and not a man older than the Civil Rights Act of 1964 who doesn't know how to spell "remember". As someone who always misses at least two typos per blog; ALWAYS DOUBLE CHECK YOUR SIGN BEFOREHAND.
"Blue Klux Klan"
This photo is a little screwed up because it's a screenshot from a panoramic video my buddy took, but I love a good rhyme. I also like the attention this brings to the problem. I am not in the camp that all cops are bad or racist but there's factual evidence that some of those that work forces, are the same that burn crosses. We need reform. I feel like there should be some sort of background check in place that makes Klansmen ineligible for "protecting and serving".
"Epstein Didn't Kill Himself"
This was on the back of a BLM sign which I like for a few reasons; mainly that it doesn't put Epstein front and center during a day that is NOT about him. It is important to realize we can have more than one active thought in our brain at once. Plus all this shit is interconnected.
"Pigs Smoke Mids"
There's certainly a lot going on here. Since it was three kids holding this, I felt morally obligated to crop them out, but damnit what a funny and informative sign. There's simply no coming back from "You smoke mids". I'll laugh every time.
Sometimes it's not what you say, but how you say it. There's not a lot of humor in fighting for equality, but when someone is pulling a Cardinals fan from that Hyundai commercial to fight racism you have to stop and chuckle. I wish I stopped this guy and talked to him. I need to know what went through his mind. Has he bought nothing that came in a cardboard box in the last five years? Does he not know Dollar Tree sells poster board 2 for a buck? Did he forget a sign, see a loose abandoned fence and improvise? I have nothing but questions for this man.
That's it. That's all I have for signs that have some element of humor or importance that needed sharing. Like I said I didn't take a ton of pictures of my time at either protest; neither did my friends. I spoke about the systematic racism I've witnessed in education and nobody recorded it. Part of me is happy because now that moment was just there for all of us who experienced it, but I'm an All-22 guy. I was TERRIFIED, I want to see what I did right and what I did wrong to improve for the next time I give unprepared statement in front of a crowd. #BlackLivesMatter.
P.S. I saw this parked behind me when I eventually got back to my car. Like I said, you can always find the humor in life. Once you stop, that's when you're truly dead.
Friday was National Gun Violence Awareness Day. To bring more attention (aka awareness) to the cause, Pearl Jam released the original, uncensored version of their 1992 music video "Jeremy". "Jeremy" was the band's third single (well technically it wasn't considered a single at the time) off of their legendary, 13x platinum, debut album Ten. While "Jeremy" didn't come close to cracking the Top 40, its impact is still felt today.
Eddie Vedder witnessed (thankfully, non fatal) gun violence while he was in school and wrote the song after reading the story of Jeremy Delle in the newspaper. Eddie and Jeff Ament have both said the message of the song and video was to address the communication breakdown between kids and adults; how easy it is to turn your back to someone who needs help during the stresses of everyday life. THIS WAS IN 1992.
While this country is addressing some other major societal problems that should've stopped decades ago.. I find the themes of "Jeremy" like mental health (or the lack of caring about it) and gun violence incredibly relevant.
The censored version of the video became a massive hit on MTV in the early 90's; Jeremy won Video of the Year, Best Group Video, Best Metal/Hard Rock Video and Best Direction in a Video (Mark Pellington) at the 1993 MTV Video Music Awards.
Obviously I missed this shit in real time. I wasn't watching much MTV when I was two, but I've been a fan of Pearl Jam as long as I can remember. I don't know the exact year, but I'm guessing sometime in my Great Musical Awakening of the early 2000's I learned about the history of "Jeremy" thanks to a lot of VH1. There was almost a mystique to the video at that age since it was basically banned after Columbine; it's probably what sparked my original interest in Pearl Jam. In a twist of irony, the original censor actually created confusion; some people thought the video showed Jeremy shooting his classmates.
I think the last few weeks have showed us the importance of addressing uncomfortable issues. Just because a topic is uncomfortable doesn't mean you spew "this is why I'm offended juice" everywhere without doing anything of note. Yes, all lives matter, but that won't be true until Black Lives Matter. It shouldn't be so difficult to grasp. I hope while the Revolution is taking place we can also find a way to lump in better mental health treatment and gun control. All gun violence is preventable violence and THAT is what Pearl Jam is trying to get across by releasing their work of art in its original form.
P.S. During my research for the blog I learned the origins of what is now more commonly know as the Nazi/Hitler salute. It was originally known as the "Bellamy salute" after Pledge of Allegiance writer, Francis Bellamy.
As the owner of a history degree I feel somewhat stupid just learning this now from Wikipedia, but in a way it says a lot about the American education system....What we now commonly refer to as the Nazi salute was how you were supposed to address the flag until Congress officially replaced it with the hand over your heart in DECEMBER of 1942. Although it did not start out as a hate symbol, it's easy to look back at pictures of people saluting the flag in say 1920 and be like "what the hell's going out here?" in your best Vince Lombardi. For years, before the U.S. joined the War in 1941 many Americans were like "Maybe we shouldn't be doing the same salute as a fascist dictators?" and would you believe there were major groups who tried to challenge those people? Look up the America First Committee and what they were all about when you get a chance. Did you know Dr. Seuss dabbled in political cartoons?
Seriously, read this shit about the Pledge of Allegiance.
"Under God" was added to the song in 1954 by Dwight Eisenhower aka it's not part of the original. The current Pledge of Allegiance is a remix.
DeAndre Hopkins is widely considered a top five wide receiver in the NFL. There are a decent amount of people who will argue he's the best in the league. When you consider the numbers he put up with the quality of quarterback the Texans had before Deshaun Watson there is a legitimate argument to be made he's the best WR in the NFL.
When DeAndre was traded to the Cardinals in a head scratching deal back in March, a lot of people were confused why they would trade him for a washed up running back? After the Mookie Betts trade my eyes have been wide open when it comes to poor ownership and front offices, but I'll try to stay on track.
Mookie wears #50...definitely an unusual number for a right fielder. I am kind of obsessed with jersey numbers. I've always been fascinated why athletes wear the number they do; Ray Bourque switched to 77 after they retired Phil Espostio's #7; Michael Jordan wore 23 because it's basically half of his brother's number and he wanted to be half as good as he was; Joba Chamberlain was 62 because he wanted a jersey that's digits added up 8...there's a million unique stories why athletes chose their number and I want to know them all.
Today DeAndre shared why he wears #10.
Definitely not as fun of a story as why I wore 58 in high school football**.
Ask yourself this? Why is it when black people were going through the crack epidemic in the 80's they were criminals, but today with mostly white people & opioids it's about getting them help and treatment?
I don't know the entire story behind DeAndre's cousin so it would be unfair for me to speculate, but less than $1,000 worth of drugs should not cost a person a decade of their life. Our prison system is a major part of the problem in this country. For profit prisons should be illegal.
If you have Netflix, I highly suggest watching Grass is Greener to get more informed on the "War on Drugs".
P.S. We need something light. Here is the story of how I became #58.
So my freshmen year I got #90 for my practice jersey, but since that is somehow an eligible receiver number I couldn't rock it as my real number. We were like the NFL before the 80's....nobody's game jersey was in the 90's.
I wanted to be #75 in honor of my favorite player in the NFL; Vince Wilfork.
When we were getting our numbers assigned towards the end of double sessions I was originally given #74 and wanted no part of that number. After everybody got their number our ass hole head coach asked if anybody wanted something different and I was the only freshmen who said something. I asked if I could be 75 and was told that it wasn't available because they only had one #75 (I don't remember if it was the home or away) jersey. He then said I could pick 57 or 58. I almost went 57 because it was 75 backwards, but I didn't like it. With Jonathon Papelbon in the heart of his amazing rookie year with a sub 1.00 era, I chose 58. That is how my OG alter ego: Dozah58 was born.
Notice how I've nearly already finished pulling before our tight end was even out of his stance. No wonder why we went 1-7 my senior year.